all along

chapter 30

Yara

"Come here," my dad smiles and pulls me into a hug. Everyone around is clapping in their hands and smiling. "Blew out the candles," Jade exclaims. I sit in front of this beautiful huge cake that is made specially for me. I smile and blew out all of the candles. There aren't 25 candles of course but it's fine. I look around and feel the love from everyone here.

I get all kinds of presents from people, I got new clothes from Jade that I very much liked, since I've amended it to her. It was a beautiful dress where I can't fit in now with my huge belly, but after my pregnancy I'll be able too, hopefully. I give her a hug and she chuckles softly. My dad and Emelie give me a huge present. "Dad," I tell him and he shrugs his shoulders. I start to unpack it and see a bit of the present. My whole face changes and I can't believe my dad did this, I needed it but I had no money anymore to actually buy that. A stroller for the baby and I get up to hug him and Emelie as well. "Thank you," I say. "You will need that," my dad chuckles and press a kiss on my hair, "everything for my granddaughter." I shake my head slightly, my dad loves the idea that he will get a granddaughter. He can't wait and wants to treat her with much love as he has in him. My brother smiles at me, yeah I do have a older brother. I don't see him that often because he lives in Switzerland with his wife now, so the contact is very medium. I'm happy he was able to make it.

"Can't wait to meet my little niece soon," he says and I chuckle. "Happy birthday little sis," he wishes and press a kiss on my cheek. "You're wife is expecting too right?" I ask him and he nods. "It will took so time though, she's just three months," he says and my dad looks very surprised. "So I'll be a grandfather for the second time?" He asks and my brother nods happily. "Amazing son," he says and hugs him too. Eventually I get a present from my brother and his wife, I smile and unpack it. "Oh my god," I chuckle and see a lot pure delicious chocolate, I love the chocolate from Switzerland. "Thank you," I say and give him a hug. My colleagues Kendall and Meghan have also brought something with them as a say from the whole team and it just warms up my heart.

Flowers, I got flowers from them and I hug them both back. I just feel so loved around so many people. I hear a door being opened and I turn around. Martijn is standing there, I thought he was supposed to go to Los Angles. He has a big present in his hands. "What are you doing here?" I ask him confused. "I'm not forgetting my best friends birthday," he smiles and I hug him tight and long. Maybe a bit too long and in my ear I hear him whispering I love you. Since we said I love you I don't know we're kind of dating or friends with benefits in private. No one around us knows and we both would like to keep it that way. We both bounce back from our hug and I look him in the eye. "Here is your present. Happy 25! Join the club," he says jokingly and I chuckle softly. I start unpacking and seeing something I like. "Noo Martijn," I tell him and he just smiles proudly.

"What is it?" Jade asks me and I show them all what Martijn gave me. He truly knows me best. "That dress was so damn expensive," Jade exclaims. ""It's suits you and you loved it," he simply says. "Beautiful." My dad agrees and gives the props to Martijn. "Thank you," I say and smile. My heart is doing crazy jumps and beats even faster than normal. All because of this generous gift, he also has given me shoes that I've liked for a long time and he purchased them for me.

🎈

That evening many people leave and Martijn stays. I wave goodbye to everyone and turn around. I see Martijn sitting on the couch and he looks at me. "How does it feel to be 25?" He asks me jokingly. "Ah shut up," I chuckle and get something to drink and sit next to him. "I didn't know you were coming," I say and he shrug his shoulders. "Otherwise it's no secret anymore. Try that dress I got for you," he convenes me and I shake my head. "What if it breaks , I mean this belly is huge," I say and he smiles. "It won't. I wanna know how it looks on you," he smiles and I get the dress, I'm changing myself and I barely get the zipper up.

"Martijn can you help me?" I ask him and I hear him opening the door. "Zip up," I feel his cold hands over my back sipping up my dress and he grabs my hand as I turn around. It's all black dress and he looks at me from top to toe. I bite on my lip and look at myself in the mirror. I see the weight that has come at my body, my hips are huge and my boobs are even bigger now. A quite reality check and I start crying, I don't know if I can enjoy these changes. "My hips are huge, my boobs are freaking huge, I've ugly stretch marks all over my body, my thighs are too thick," I start calling out all the things I hate about myself. I close myself and I can't even look at myself.

I feel two arms wrapped around me, they're resting on my hips. "I think you look absolutely beautiful. Your hips are maybe a bit bigger now and have grown, but so do flowers and they're beautiful as well. Maybe your boobs are bigger yes, but you're making like food for your baby girl, like bees make honey and do everything for their queen, so do you for your little queen in there. I honestly think that stretch marks are the most beautiful thing a woman can have, it shows their story, you should treat it with kindness like we should treat the beaches the sand with kindness, your t thighs, maybe there're huge but it shows you're strong and powerful woman just like any other woman out there. Just like any other female animal. All of these things reminds me all in a way of nature and nature is so beautiful. Why should you hate on nature?" He tells me and I'm fully quiet. My thoughts have stopped overthinking and I'm taking in his words.

I look up and see him smiling to me. "You think I'm beautiful?" I ask him. "You're magnificent," he whispers and I feel tears rolling down my cheeks. I softly feel his lips on mine and I smile softly through this kiss.