Bring The Rain

Chapter 25

Ara's POV

"Time to see Ms. Geneva! Are you excited"? Zahir shook his little head yes and grabbed my hand to walk through the parking lot. I scanned the parks and the entrance hoping to see Mike's SUV but it was nowhere in sight. Usually we text throughout the day and plan to meet up when Zahir has a speech therapy session but I hadn't heard from him all day. I was beginning to worry, it was unusual for him to ignore my messages or not check in with us by lunch time. Even on his busiest days Mike makes it a point to reach out to Zahir and I.
I decided to send him another quick text just to check in with him. 'Zahir's lesson is starting. Are you gonna make it'? It was only a few seconds before I got a response 'be there soon'. It didn't explain where he'd been all day but I was just glad to hear from him. It had only been a few hours since I saw him this morning but I was already missing him. I was nervous and excited just to be around him. All day long the only thing on my mind was the start of our new relationship.
I was so wrapped up in my thoughts that I didn't notice Mike come in until he was sliding in the seat next to me. His expression was stern and I couldn't tell if he was angry with me. My mind immediately started thinking of what I could have done to upset him and how I needed to apologize. "Are you upset"? He wrapped his arm around me pulling me closer to him. "I'm not upset, but we do need to talk". My heart was racing, what could be wrong now, everything seemed to be getting better between us, what the hell did I do to mess up so quickly? "I'm sorry". His expression turned into confusion "what are you sorry for sweetheart? You didn't do anything wrong".
"I don't know….I guess I'm just used to having to apologize. No matter what the situation was in the past everything always seems to be my fault when it came to Javier's anger". I hated that I mentioned his name again, I didn't want to think of that man ever again. If I wanted to move on with my life and have a new beginning with Mike then I needed to leave Javier in my past where he belonged. "Javier is exactly who we need to discuss. He is in jail and hopefully for a very long time" Mike stated.
The past few weeks I'd been trying as hard as possible to settle the fears I had in my mind of Javier finding me and trying to hurt me. The only thing I felt now was pure relief. I always felt like Mike would protect me from him but now with him being incarcerated I know without a doubt that he could no longer hurt me. "You're sure he won't be released? What if he gets out and blames me for going to jail"?
"Ara, I don't want you to worry about any of that. Javier's current case has nothing to do with you. I actually hope this means that he's moved on". I question what this meant and why Mike was so sure he wouldn't be released. "Javier apparently moved on quickly once you left. His current girlfriend was assaulted by him and now her sister has contacted my office begging for help with their criminal case".
My heart sank for the woman who had to put up with the same abuse that I once did. "What did he do this time"? Mike seemed uneasy like he couldn't find the words to answer just how bad it was. "Let's talk about it once we get home, OK"? I nodded my head in agreement because my gut told me it had to be bad. I silently said a prayer for that woman and her family. Let this be a lesson to her to get out early, don't be dumb and stick around like I did. Men like Javier never change for the better, they just get worse until you leave or they kill you.
Once Zahir's session was over he came bouncing out of the room full of energy. He loved Ms. Geneva and her speech therapy sessions always seemed more like play time rather than work, that's probably why she was so good and also expensive. "Zahir did so well today"! She went on with all the things she wanted us to continue at home and the sounds we needed to start practicing. Mike listened intently to everything she said, even making notes of what we needed to practice with Zahir. I wanted to focus on what Geneva was saying but my mind wouldn't let me. I couldn't stop thinking of what Javier may have done to someone else. I kept telling myself; that could've been me. I didn't feel bad for leaving Javier because I needed to escape but I felt like somehow this woman's pain was my fault. No one else deserved to be hurt or hit or verbally abused constantly but I couldn't warn the entire world to stay away from this man.
"Ara are you alright"? I was completely in my own head and I didn't realize that Mike was talking to me. "Will you be OK to drive home"? I had to assure Mike that I was alright before he'd let me leave. He promised to be home before dinner but he had to go back to work. I called Tara after Zahir and I got home. I needed someone to lean on and Mike was busy with work so I didn't want to disturb him.
" Ara, honey, none of this is your fault". I could just picture Tara standing with her hands on her hips as she gave me more big sister guidance. "There's no way you could have protected another woman from Javier. You are only learning to protect yourself now. I feel just as bad for this other woman as you do but this is not your fight. You did what you needed to do to get away from that maniac and don't you dare feel bad about choosing a better life for yourself".
She was right, I couldn't beat myself up for Javier's actions. Sometimes just hearing common sense from one of your friends could change your entire perspective. We talked for over an hour about everything, but what Tara was waiting to hear about was of course what the latest news on my relationship with Mike was. I told her about this morning and her words of advice: "Go for it!".
I could only laugh at her. Of course I had feelings for Mike that I wanted to explore but Tara acted like she was ready to be my bridesmaid in our wedding. "Tara, I think we should take things slow and Mike has agreed to that". I just knew she was on the other side of the phone rolling her eyes and I couldn't help but giggle. "All I'm saying is that you two make the cutest couple and I'm all for it"! We laughed and talked until we were both finished cooking dinner. We said our goodbyes and promised to talk again soon.
I hoped Mike would be home soon. We needed to discuss some things and the longer I waited the more nervous I was feeling. "Ah Ah"! Zahir came into the kitchen screaming my name. "Eat, please". He said the words perfectly, without even being asked. He knew I would never be able to resist his cute little face and because he said his words so clearly I had to give in to him. I let him eat as much as he wanted and although I was getting hungry I chose to wait for Mike to get home so we could sit down together.
After Zahir finished eating he let me bathe him. Of course he had to pour lots of bubble bath into the tub and his father had the genius idea of buying bathtime crayons. The crayon marks were easily washed off with water but Zahir had a great time drawing all over himself, the bathtub, and of course my arms as I tried to wash him. I couldn't be mad at him seeing how much fun he was having making his art work. Finally he let me clean the colorful streaks off of him and get him out of the tub. I wrapped him in a brand new towel that had a hood attached to it with a frog face at the top. Zahir and I found it while out shopping recently and I love hearing him say "fog" as best as he could when he saw it. Ms. Geneva was teaching him animal names and sounds and that seemed to be his favorite lesson so far.
"Ok Zahir, what sound does a frog make"? He immediately started imitating the croaking of a frog. "And a frog doesn't walk, but what does he do"? "Hop"! He screamed and began hoping his way around the room. This child was always so full of life and energy. I just prayed he wouldn't slip and fall on the bathroom tile. Mike appeared just in time to scoop Zahir into his arms before I had to beg him to be careful on the slippery wet tile. "Why is there a frog in the bathroom"? Mike asked Zahir as he picked him up, gently shaking him, making him burst into laughter. "You have to go outside, little frog". Zahir continued to laugh at his fathers antics while Mike cradled him like a baby taking him to his room to get dressed. "No, no! No outside"! Zahir yelled through his giggles.
Mike barely glanced my way when he came in and I found myself being thankful for that. I'd waited for hours just to talk to him and now I felt all my pent up nervousness come to the surface. I tried busying myself by cleaning the bathtub and getting rid of Zahir's colorful creations he'd left on the bath walls. That didn't take much time and I knew I couldn't just avoid Mike forever. I went back to the kitchen to make our plates for dinner and waited.
"Zahir is playing in the family room and watching cartoons. That should keep him busy for a while". He sat down beside me and per usual moved his chair closer to mine leaving little room between us. He seemed nervous as well, like he couldn't find the right words to start the conversation. "The young lady I told you about earlier, her name is Farren, do you know her"?
I shook my head, "I didn't really know any of Javier's other women, I just knew that he cheated constantly". Mike paused for a minute before he continued. "Ara, I have to ask you something that I prayed I wouldn't have to discuss. Did Javier ever…." He trailed off and I was even more worried of what was going to come. Mike cleared his throat and tried again. "I read Farren's police statement today. It says that in their most recent altercation Javier choked her until she was unconscious. Farren claims that she later awoke with her wrists tied together. Javier kept her locked in his apartment for two days straight before she was able to contact her sister and escape. He's being charged with first degree sexual assault, rape, sodomy and kidnapping".
I quickly realized what Mike was trying to ask me and my heart broke for Farren. No human being deserved to experience that level of mistreatment and especially not at the hands of someone who claims to care about you. "Javier tried to pressure me or make me feel guilty if I wouldn't have sex with him but he never forced me, not like that". Mike sighed like he'd been holding his breath waiting for my response. "Ara, I'm not a violent person but I would have killed that man myself if he hurt you like that". I could hear both relief and anger in his voice. "Because of the move to Florida I don't have time to handle Farren's case but one of my colleagues has agreed to take it on. Thankfully you were not sexually assaulted by him but you still suffered physical and verbal abuse. I totally understand if you don't want to but it would help if you agreed to testify when we can get a court hearing. I'll be with you the entire time and Javier won't be able to touch you".
I never wanted to see him again but there was no way I was going to sit by and allow him to get away with something so heinous. "I'll do it, whatever you need me to do to make sure he actually goes to jail this time, I'll do". Mike reassured me multiple times that everything would be OK. There was more than enough evidence to convince a jury to convict Javier, no judge would be able to let him off the hook this time. Even though I still felt terrible for Farren I was so thankful that Javier would finally pay for everything he's done to me. He deserves years in prison and I truly felt that this time I would get the justice I deserved.
With all of that out of the way the night felt much lighter. We had a pleasant dinner together, we talked about his work and the upcoming move to Florida. Everything just flowed when we were together, like two best friends making plans or dare I say like an old married couple who were so used to each other's company. I hadn't brought up our conversation from this morning. I had no idea where to start or how to say 'Mike I have the biggest crush on you'. I had to laugh at myself a little, I was definitely feeling like a school girl with a crush on her best friend. Zahir came marching into the kitchen just as Mike and I were finishing. He reached his arms up for his father to pick him up and Mike grabbed him without hesitation and sat him on the kitchen island.
"Ara, we would like to ask you to join us for movie night. We would like to make up for last night's fiasco. And of course we'll watch movies in the family room if you're not comfortable coming to my bedroom". Zahir was busy playing with his toy car and I'm sure he couldn't care less about watching movies with me and his dad. "As long as I don't have to watch the Paw Patrol Movie for the third time today I'll be there". We agreed to meet in 30 minutes after taking quick showers. I wished that I'd purchased at least one pair of pajamas that wasn't so revealing but since it was summer time every pair I picked out were shorts and tank tops. I chose a cute purple sleep set with printed images of little teddy bears all over. I thought Zahir would love the bears, another animal for him to imitate.
When I walked into the family room I found Mike and Zahir busy at work. They had all of the dining room chairs and a large dark blue sheet with yellow stars all over it. "Let me guess, we're making a blanket fort for movie night"? Zahir giggled and ran inside of their homemade tent. "Another gift from his grandparents that we got in the mail today. They have decided that they want to take him camping soon so of course they couldn't resist buying this indoor tarp when they saw it". Mike kept trying his best to make the fort stable while Zahir ran around the inside.
Mike made popcorn for us and to make the experience even more fun for Zahir he used his laptop to play the movie instead of the TV. He completely enclosed the three of us inside of the homemade tent after shutting off the lights. The tarp was like a giant soft blanket and once the lights were off the star patterns actually glowed in the dark. Zahir was so excited he plopped himself right in front of the laptop and took the entire bowl of popcorn for himself as if his father and I weren't even there. Usually I would have made Zahir share and move away from the screen for fear of straining his eyes but my mind was preoccupied.
Mike sat at least an arms length away from me which was unusual. I guessed that he wants to give me space and the time to really consider our relationship but how could I admit how bad I wanted to be with him when I was too nervous to say anything. We were listening to some Netflix cartoon movie and soon we could hear Zahir's soft snoring. "That didn't take long. Thank you for spending some time with us tonight, I know Zahir loves it when we're together". Mike got up crawling his way out of the fort and started cleaning. This was my moment, as Tara said, I need to go for it. "Mike, why don't you take Zahir upstairs and I'll clean up down here. Maybe we can spend some time together once he's in bed"? Mike looked surprised but elated at the offer and agreed to come back down once he was sure Zahir was comfortable and sleeping through the night.
It only took a minute to fold and put away the tarp and clean up the few pieces of popcorn that were scattered on the floor. I sat on the couch with butterflies in my stomach waiting for Mike to come back. As he rounded the corner I told myself it was now or never, I needed to be fully honest with Michael about my feelings. Again he sat further away from me than usual but he gave me that cute smirk he always had; "Did you have anything in mind that you want to watch"? Those butterflies in my stomach were doing all kinds of flips and tricks when he looked at me. My mind just kept screaming to me 'Just say it! Tell him how you feel'. I completely poured my heart out to him last night so why was I so nervous now?
I moved closer to him, closing the gap between us. "I was hoping that we could talk". His demeanor changed slightly, giving me his full attention. I felt even more hesitant now that we were face to face but I had to take this opportunity or I may not have the courage to ever do this again. "This morning you said I could tell you when I'm ready to move forward with our relationship; I want you to know that I'm ready". It was such a simple phrase that shouldn't have been hard to say but it took everything in me to articulate my feelings. I held my breath waiting for his response.