Katie McCabe~ enemies, to friends, to lovers.

𝑖𝑚 ℎ𝑒𝑟𝑒

I wake up in a pool of sweat, struggling to breathe. I have no clue of the time but judging by the darkness outside it must have still been late. I knew what was about to come, I have experienced panic attacks before, not very often. I figured it must have been from being away from home, which sounds silly considering that I lived in Barcelona but even out there I would have panic attacks.

I had no sense of what to do, my breathing was only getting heavier, tears streaming down my face. I hated crying, I never cry, ask anyone they will tell you. "Ellianna?" "Ellianna, what's happened?" Katie's repeats before jumping out of bed to come next to me. It had soon become apparent that I couldn't speak because before I knew it Katie had brung my head down to her chest. "Follow the sound of my heart beat, can you do that?" Katie says, of course I didn't say anything but I could feel my breathing slowing down.

Finally I had got my breath back before bringing my head up, locking eyes with Katie. "can you tell me what happened?" she says in a softly spoken voice, I've never heard her speak like this, it was nice. "it was just a nightmare, that's all" i say wiping my eyes letting out a little chuckle. Katie's eyes looked sympathetic, I hated people feeling sorry for me, it made me feel weak. "I'm sorry, I've never cried in front of someone before" I say making sure to clear the air, placing both my hands on my thighs as my legs bounce up and down, before I knew it Katie had placed her hand on mine. "You're aloud to cry" was all she said, I knew I was but it was just never a sight that I wanted anyone to see. I knew Katie was just being nice but apart of me just wanted to tell her everything, apart of me just wanted to pour my heart out to her and grab her for a hug and never let go, but that wasn't  an option. We hated each other, and that was how it was going to stay. "you can always talk to me" Katie says. "That's what everyone always says." I say, I already knew I had said to much as the expression on Katie's face suddenly changed. "I don't even know why I said that, sorry" I laughed, a fake laugh, but hopefully enough to not raise anymore suspicions. "talk to me." was all katie said.

how am I supposed to talk to the person who hates me? was this all just an act? did she just want me to pour my heart out to use it against me?

all these thoughts flooded my mind, Katie wasn't a bad person. It just had major trust issues, but with Katie it felt safe to talk to her, so why couldn't I? "It's just hard, il get through it though" I say, I knew nothing I could say would get her off my back, and technically I wasn't lying, things had been hard. But I would get through it. As my gaze followed from Katie's eyes down to my feet, before I knew it Katie had grabbed my hand, interlocking our fingers. This had sent me in a spiral, as soon as our fingers connected it felt as if tho sparks had been let off in my organs, how can the girl I hate have this affect on me?

"𝑖𝑚 ℎ𝑒𝑟𝑒"

Katie says, I hated how weak I felt but it felt okay with Katie, everything was 𝑜𝑘𝑎𝑦

"Thank you Katie, and can we please not tell anyone about this" I sob, wiping the last few tears from my face as Katie slowly nods to me. "Get some sleep, we still have a while until we need to be up" she whispered, how can the most rudest girl go so sweet, and why did I love it?

Before I knew it we was both back in bed ready to go back to sleep, but how could I sleep when she was racing through my mine? I'm sure she was just trying to be nice.

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