Roommates | Solby Smut

14. Why Won't You Love Me?

A/N: I know this story has gotten really sad but that was the plan all along. Anyway another chapter inspired by a song. You can listen or not I don't care lol. Anyway, more triggers and sad stuff incoming.

TW: SH, Mentions of suicide

Sam's POV

I didn't sleep at all last night. Thoughts of Colby raced through my mind and I couldn't stop thinking about why he did what he did. I woke up around lunch time to a text from Colby's mom. They said they were going to go to the hospital around 1 and asked if I could pick them up. I got up and showered really quickly. Looking at all the cuts littering my arms. I may have made some more in the middle of the night when I couldn't sleep. I put on one of Colby's favorite hoodies and some sweatpants. I grabbed my belongings and walked to my car. I drove to the hotel his parents were at and texted them that I was here. His mom got in the front seat and his dad sat in the back. The drive was silent and I think everyone was nervous to see Colby. We made it to the hospital and we parked before walking inside. We checked in and got visitor passes before heading up to his room. Colby was asleep when we came in so we all took a seat. I sat on the floor next to his bed holding his hand. An hour or so had passed before I felt him move. I looked up and saw his eyes flutter open.

"Colby. Babe. Hi" I say tears streaming down my face.

"Where am I? What happened" he asks looking around and seeing his mom and dad.

"Well sweetie" his mom says "you um well hurt yourself and tried to kill yourself honey. Sam found you on the bathroom floor after a party."

"Oh" he looks down as his arms covered in bandages. "Can I talk with Sam alone please?" He mumbles. His mom and dad leave to go get some coffee. I sit down on the side of the bed and hold his hand. We sit in silence for a bit before I break the silence.

"Why did you do it Colby? I can't wrap my head around it. I tried to think, and the only thing is can think is that you don't love me anymore."

He sits in silence for a bit, so I add "Colby, why won't you love me? What did I do? Please just talk to me."

He finally sighs before saying "Sam you did nothing wrong. It's me."

"What are you saying? Are you breaking up with me?" I raise my voice louder than I should have but I was angry. "I've done nothing but love and care for you. What are you saying?"

Colby is now the one to raise his voice "I WAS RAPED SAM." He is crying and shaking at this point, and I am at a loss for words.

He sighs again and grabs my hand. "At the party when you went inside, some guy came out back and grabbed me and took me behind the fence. He raped me Sam. I didn't want to tell you because I thought you would be mad at me. I didn't know what to do. I thought I would just make a few cuts and feel okay but nothing stopped the pain I was feeling. I'm sorry I just don't know what to do." He sits and cries for a little while as I rub circles on his hand.

"I'm sorry Colby. I shouldn't have assumed anything. I didn't know. I wish I could take away the pain for you."

"It's okay Sam. I should have talked to you instead of doing what I did."

Colby's parents come back in with the doctor following behind. The doctor checked his stats again before he talked about what comes next.

"So, Colby, I was talking with your parents, and I think the best course of action would be to go to inpatient treatment here at the hospital. They should be able to help you talk about your feelings, show you better ways to cope and help you deal with everything going on right now. It is 100% up to you as you are an adult, but I really think it will help you, Colby."

Colby looks between me and his parents but doesn't say anything. The doctor tells him he will give him some time to think about it and said he will be back soon.

His parent both tell him it could be really good for him and that he should consider it. He just nods and tells them to go get some food and rest a bit. They agree and leave after kissing him. I sit beside Colby again hand in hand.

"So, are you gonna go?" I ask tears already in my eyes.

"Sam I think we both know I need to go. I need to focus on my mental health and getting better for you. I don't want to constantly worry you and have you scared that I am going to kill myself. It will only be for a little while and then I will be out."

He wipes a tear from my cheek and I nod. "I know it will be best for you. I just am really going to miss you. But I am worried about you, and I want you to be the best version of yourself not just for me but for you too." I nod and kiss him on the forehead.

"Are you wearing my hoodie?" He asks chuckling. I nod and he laughs before placing a kiss on my lips.

"I have something to tell you Colby," I say already nervous and shaking.

"You're pregnant? I didn't know that was possible" I slap his arm before continuing. "No Colby. Actually, I think it is best to just show you."

He looks at me with a puzzled expression before I stand up and start taking off his hoodie. After getting the hoodie off I show him my arms. I can't look at him as he just sits there and stares at my arms.

"Why Sam?" He asks tears falling down his face.

"I thought you didn't love me and I swore I was gonna lose you. I couldn't bare the thoughts in my head so I did this instead. I am sorry Colby. Don't be mad at me please."

"Don't ever do that again Sam. Don't be like me. You don't want to go down this road. Please just talk to me. I know this was a weird circumstance but please don't do this Sam." I hug him as we sit a cry for a bit. His parents return with food for all of us and the doctor comes back later in the day. Colby agreed to go to treatment, and he will be transported to the center tomorrow. We all sat with him for a while before it was time for visitors to leave. I kiss Colby goodbye and leave with tears running down my face. I take his parents back to their hotel. They will be leaving tomorrow to go back home.

As of tomorrow, Colby will be gone for 30 days to get help and I will be all alone to think about everything that has happened the past couple of days.