The Love We Found || Narry *COMPLETED*

.37

»Thinking Out Loud - Ed Sheeran«

H

I was going to take Isabella's advice. I was going to take baby steps. Take this one day at a time. Niall doesn't hate me but he is scared of what I did. Fuck, even I'm scared of what I did to him. I wish I could take it back. I really wish I could. In fact, I wish I could take back doing the drugs.

I woke up the next morning alone; Niall was keeping up his end of his deal. We weren't to sleep in the same bed. Let me tell you this, it was hard to fall asleep. I just wanted to hold him all night long. I wanted to play with his hair until he fell asleep. Who knows when I'll be able to do that again.

I pulled on some sweatpants and walked out of the bedroom. I headed towards Niall's old room and slowly opened the door to see him still sound asleep. This was good.

My first step to getting him to forgive me? Breakfast in bed. A big breakfast since that boy has a huge appetite. After quietly closing the door, I headed downstairs and into the kitchen. Looking at the time on the wall it read that it was almost 7am. I was actually surprised that Mr. Evans wasn't in here. But that didn't matter right now. I was going to make Niall breakfast today. I was also going to make him lunch and even dinner. These were baby steps, right?

I decided on making pancakes, scrambled eggs, bacon and hash browns. I made the pancakes huge. That probably wasn't the best decision on my part cause I was making a huge mess all over the stove. Mr. Evans will probably be upset on the inside but have a smile on the outside...since he is on thin ice right now. But Mr. Evans wasn't who I should be focusing on right now. It was Niall.

Everything had to be perfect for Niall. I wanted to show him that I was working hard for his forgiveness. I wanted him to know that I really was sorry and that I was never going to do something as stupid as drugs ever again. I hurt my Niall because of them. I never wanted to hurt him. All I ever wanted to do was protect him.

I finished making his breakfast and cleaned up my mess the best that I could. There was no doubt that Mr. Evans would probably clean the stove again anyway (he did it every morning). I placed all the food I made onto a plate and headed up the spiral staircase. I smiled to myself thinking I had done pretty well with this meal. I just hoped Niall would think the same.

I slowly pushed open the door and frowned when I hadn't seen him laying on the bed. So I set the food down on the dresser and that's when I heard water running.

"Niall?" I called out as I slowly headed towards the en suite.

I didn't get answer so I slowly pushed open the already partly ajar door. I could faintly hear whimpers come from Niall. I shouldn't even be in here. Harry, turn around and get out of the bathroom while you still can. But I kept walking towards the shower. I tried fighting back the urge to pull back the shower curtain; I really did try. As soon as I pulled back that curtain, I regretted it.

I had startled Niall and he almost slipped in the shower. He steadied himself by placing his hands on the shower wall, but at the same time he was trying to cover himself up. But it was no use; I saw the marks I left on him. I covered my mouth and let out a soft gasp. How could I have done that to him? There were marks and bruises all over his backside and even his legs.

I wanted the cry.

Maybe I should have. I could feel the tears burning in my eyes and I just couldn't say anything but "I'm so sorry" as Niall just stared at me. When he turned off the water, I began to back away from him and eventually left the bathroom. I looked down at my now shaking hands. I couldn't believe I was capable of doing that to anyone. That's when the tears finally came. I tried wiping them away the best that I could, but I couldn't do it fast enough.