affectionate

2

FALLON

   With winter near and the sun hiding away from the world earlier and earlier causing the moon to take its place in the sky, work was slow. Unsurprisingly, I still had my job working as a store clerk at the corner store at the end of the same street my house was on. I didn't work crazy hours and the pay was decent enough for someone who still lived with her parents so there was no reason for me to quit after high school. I was also ninety nine percent sure the owner, an old man who was three compliments away from me deeming him as a pervert, had a thing for me. I didn't entertain whatever feelings he had for me. He was way too old and the touch thing was still very much an issue. I did however take advantage of his kindness towards me and used it to take off of work when I wanted to without any repercussions. But recently the days that I did have to come in, were days I wished I was at home bathing in familiar silence or at school listening to my teachers drone on and on about the human mind and how it works.

The weather was less than ideal and the indigo sky leered ominously above. It was the type of sky that reminded women to not walk the streets alone and kids to go inside once the street lights turned on. Which meant that the store was empty as soon as six-thirty hit. It was just me, the continuous drone of the slushy machines mixing syrup and ice together and the bright fluorescent lights that flickered every once in a while. I blew a raspberry before bringing my elbow up on the counter and resting my cheek in my hand. It was seven now and I didn't get off until nine-thirty. To make matters worse I had class bright and early the next morning at eight. These were the times that I mentally kicked myself in the butt for signing up for those nasty morning classes back in July.

The later it got, the heavier my eyes grew. The chilliness inside the store wasn't helping either. It only made me want to snuggle further in my puffer jacket, chase the warmth that I desperately craved at the moment.

The bell on the door of the entrance jingled loudly, and a strong gust of wind followed the noise, almost knocking me over and definitely pulling me out of my drowsy state. My eyes followed who had walked in. A man, it seemed. He was tall and lanky but I could tell rippling muscle hid beneath his spindly arms if he flexed them. He had black hair that sat on his head in waves and tickled the top of his neck and teased the tops of his ears. A diamond stud caught the attention of the shitty lights above and twinkled and I could only assume his other ear was pierced as well. I couldn't see his full face but I saw the arch of his nose and part of a full, bushy brow. It was strange. He was strange. It was maybe thirty degrees outside and aside from his thick black jeans, he had nothing else on except for a maroon short sleeved shirt. From where I stood behind the register I could see tattoos littering the better parts of his arm and more tiny ones on his hand. A few rings adorned his long fingers and I felt my cheeks heat a little because I wasn't going to lie. He was attractive. Or at least from what I could see he was.

But I knew better than to swoon. For obvious reasons I couldn't pursue him even if I wanted to. I let my eyes wander back to the front door as he disappeared down an aisle toward the back where the drinks were. The sky was even darker now, the only thing I could see was the parking lot where my black toyota sat unbothered. I sighed quietly and continued to gaze forlornly out the glass door, wanting so badly to clock out and go home. I was startled out of my stupor by the sound of someone clearing their throat. I turned around, only to be met with the most dazzling eyes I had ever seen in my life. They put my mother's hazel ones to shame. They were an electrifying shade of blue with specks of gray wondering about here and there. My eyes roamed around the rest of the man's face and noted the eyebrow piercing on his left eyebrow, and how plump his pale pink lips were. I looked back up at him only to see the same eyebrow I was ogling moments before raised in question.

I sniffled a bit before shaking my head and looking down at whatever it was he had placed down on the counter while I was shamelessly checking him out. A single can of mango arizona. It was my turn to raise my brow as I looked up at him once again, silently questioning his drink choice since it was basically below freezing outside and an arizona is the last thing I would reach for.

"Is that all?" I mumbled, while ringing him up anyways. He nodded and held his hand out, which seemed to have the correct amount of change already waiting patiently in his palm. I hated when customers gave me money like this. Unnecessary physical contact for me and for them. I grimaced and brought my hand forward anyways because it didn't look like he was going to drop it on the counter anytime soon. Our hands touched and my breath was already being held, I'd been feeling this strange burning sensation my entire life but it always hurt like a bitch. There would never be enough words to describe what it felt like when people touched me. It felt wrong and hot, like pressing whatever part of my body was being touched against a hot stove.

But this, this was different.

We only touched for a second, not even long enough to pass as a real touch, more like a gentle graze. The change dropped into my hand but I couldn't pull away and it seemed like he couldn't either. Our hands hovered in the air, centimeters away, frozen in place like leaves trapped beneath the ice of a frozen lake.

When I touched him, it didn't burn. There was no red, hot, sizzling sensation, the feeling of a fire breaking out on my skin could not be felt. Instead, a warm, tingling sensation spread throughout my hand. Starting from the tips of my fingers and ending at my wrist. I felt my shoulders sag a little once the tingling was over and my skin stopped swimming in pleasure. All I could muster out in response was a breath of air. Without telling them to, my eyes shot up and looked into his. His pupils were blown, the remaining blue in them was nothing but a thin ring around the black. He snatched his hand back along with his drink as quickly as our moment had happened and sprinted out the door. Adrenaline pumped through my body and I ran from around the counter and chased him out the door into the freezing night. Only, he was nowhere to be seen. My head swiveled in all different directions, my eyes looking, no searching for a glimpse of the maroon shirt so maybe I could follow him.

My feet seemed to move on their own accord and before I knew it I was at the edge of the parking lot. Once again, it was a gust of wind that knocked some sense into me. What was I doing? Chasing some unknown man into the dark at eight-thirty at night? Over something that I definitely could have imagined? No, I definitely did not imagine that.

Me and touch were on two sides of the same coin. I knew it well yet I didn't know it at all. I knew what it did to me, I knew what it did for others, and I knew it was something that I was destined to not have. And I also knew, that I needed to feel whatever that was again. All over me. I wanted to be submerged in it, I wanted it to drown me and all five of my senses. I wanted it, but the question was: could I have it?

-

That night, after my shift at the store and I made the eerily quiet drive back to my house where I immediately trudged upstairs not even bothering to say hello to my parents, I took a scolding hot shower to wash away the clingy chill on my body and dove under my duvet. I tucked my head under my pillow and closed my eyes.

Thoughts of him and what happened earlier consumed me. I saw the scene over and over again behind my eyelids and a ghost of what I felt earlier haunted me. I groaned. It was clear that sleep was not an option tonight.

-

yayyy first interaction between them