When We're Older | Chris Collins

Chapter 24

I gave you attention when nobody else was payin'

I gave you the shirt off my back when nobody else

Was sayin'..... to keep you warm

I showed you the game everybody else was playin'

That's for sure

And I was on my knees when nobody else was prayin'

Oh Lord

Where are you now that I need ya? -Justin Beiber

Montana's pov

Little by little, weeks passed and I find myself in July. The 4th of July a wonderful time of the year. You hang out with your friends, watch the fireworks and try to push in the very back of your mind that you are leaving for college in a matter of two months.

Yeah, you guessed it. I still haven't told them. Crawford has been itching at me to say something and I say that I will but end up freaking out and not saying anything whatsoever.

I wish everything wasn't so complicated. I've spent nights in my room crying because it's so hard on me as their friend to tell them that I'll be moving away.

"Who wants a hotdog?" My mom yells as she puts them on a foil covered plate and wraps them up. Crawford and Bailey walk over and get one while Chris walks over to me and sits down, pulling me onto his lap. He wraps his arms around my waist. I lean my head on his and he whispers, "What's wrong baby girl?" My heart beats a million miles an hour.

"Nothing, everything is perfect." My voice breaks at the end.

"That's not true. I know it isn't."

I smile at him to show that I am happy. "Do you see this smile? It's because of you." I say and poke his cheek. "You're adorable, but what's bothering you?" He asks again.

"Christian, don't worry about it. It's fine. I'm fine."

"Since when have you called me by my full name?" he smiles cheekily and I giggle. I shrug my shoulders and kiss his cheek. A red tint forms on his cheeks causing one to form on mine as well. "I guess I won't make you tell me. I want to go out with you tomorrow night though. If you're up for it of course. I have to tell you something." He says and my mind wanders to what it could be. I've been wanting to tell him I love him for a very long time but never worked up the nerve to tell him. And of course if I can;t even tell him I am moving away how could I possibly do that.

Also, if I tell him I love him and then say I'm moving away, how would we even be able to be together to love each other?

What if he's gonna tell me that he's moving away too?

I'd be heartbroken but relieved. Relieved that I wasn't the only one hiding something. He's so perfect though. I'm going to miss his gorgeous face. Him in general.

Maybe tomorrow will be the time I tell him.

Panic rises in my stomach and I feel as if I'm going to hurl.

"I'll be right back." I tell Chris but it comes out as a whisper. I run inside into the bathroom and my worry releases into the porcelain bowl. I hear footsteps as I flush the toilet and lean my body against the wall. Bailey walks around the corner and I'm relieved it's her.

"Hey, are you alright?" she asks and I nod my head slowly.

"Just feeling a bit sick is all."

"You've been acting really strange lately. What's going on? And don't try to tell me that it's nothing because I know that isn't true." She asks and I admit to myself that I had to tell her sooner or later.

"Well I applied to get into a college and I got accepted."

"Are you kidding? That's amazing! Where?" She beams and I sigh. Here comes the hard part.

"That's the thing, it's in Florida."

"In Florida?"

"Yeah."

"But that's so far away! I'll never get to see you." She says while clinging to me. "I know. We can still skype all the time and text and call." I explain but she starts to cry. "It won't be the same though," she says and wipes away her tears, "so when do you leave?"

I sigh and wipe away an unnoticed tear from my cheek. "August 20th." I admit and I hear her breathing heavily. "Wow, that's really soon."

"I know. I'll still come up once in a while." I say in hopes of cheering her up. "Did you tell Chris?" She asks and I rest my head against the wall.

"No, I'm going to tell him tomorrow. He asked me to go out with him and he said he had to tell me something." I say and she nods. "What do you think it could be?"

"Well if he's had the same thoughts as me, he might say he loves me."

"Would you say it back?" Bailey asks me. "I might. But I'm moving away so don't you think I shouldn't?" Bailey looks at me in deep thought. "Well if you really do love him I would tell him."

She's right. I couldn't just not tell him I love him, when I really do. I wish everything wasn't stressing me out so much. It wouldn't be so bad if I wasn't dating Chris. I'm not mature enough to figure out my whole life, I mean I'm only 18. Most people my age are naive and stupid. I don't want to be that way.

They think that a relationship with some guy or some girl is the most important thing in the world. Shouldn't they be thinking about their future? Their career? Do they actually want to do something with their life?

In that moment I realized I was talking to myself. Askig myself those questions. Do I really wanna do something with my life? I do.

You guys this chapter is exactly 1k words. Excluding this authors note.

So sorry it took forever to update. I've been kind of busy. I started a YouTube channel and I was editing my first video so I just uploaded it yesterday so check it out guys!! My channel name is: Khyra Guidish

Anyways what do you think Chris has to tell her?

Will she tell him she's moving away?

Vote comment and follow me to find out! Love you beauties!

Bye!

Khyra xx