You lay on soft cotton beds
Scratch at your baby skin
Peal off your porcelain lips
Cover your arms
Cover your eyes
When will they see the nothing that captivates your mind and steals away the person you were.
How will they know not to blame you for your own anger.
How will they know you are also mad at your own anger.
You inflict pain on yourself for the things you created.
You're mad that you're mad.
Anger blurs your mind and the only way back is to scratch your skin raw.
You will never feel the same. Never handle stress the same way you once did.
It's still there in your mind.
The thought of the pain and tangible evidence of your mental state is like sweet candy to your mind.
As your last cut fades away, you want another.
You know it's bad.
You know you shouldn't and you don't.
Not today.
But that doesn't stop you from scratching your skin raw.
You had been 2 weeks free of scratching your skin.
But today. Your first day of complete nothingness, was to much to handle.
You don't like cleaning very much. Don't enjoy sitting doing nothing very much. You love being outside.
Today you hadn't done that for more then 2 minutes.
You slept for 13 hours last night.
Not straight. You woke up a couple of times for an hour at most.
What's wrong with you Mia?
We're is the sweet girl I know?
Who has taken her?
Why don't you feel anything when you are alone?
I don't know
