Ad Astra Per Aspera

Chapter 11

"Lies. Lies. Lies."

Astralea's POV

Well, that dream escalated quickly.

"Let me guess, a sex dream." Blaze saying from the corner.

"Is that your hobby, to watch me sleep?"

"When you have sex dreams, absolutely. "

Ugh, men.

"How much do you remember?"

I don't answer. What am I supposed to say, I remember having sex with him that made me feel alive. I don't think we are that close.

"You remember how you felt for him, didn't you?"

"Yes. I- I had feelings for him. How could I forget? How could I forget a ball where I roasted people and where he and I became... close?"

"Ah, the ball. After that day you stopped telling your dad shit. I believe that's the day when you chose him. You didn't know that yet, but that there was a ball is the last thing you reported to your father. You didn't even give him any details. At least that's what you claimed later."

"He found out?"

"He did. But I won't spoil anything for you. You have to remember everything for yourself. "

"Did I love him?"

He stayed quiet for a second and I wasn't sure he was going to respond. Just when I was about to change the subject he spoke. "I believe you are the only one who could answer that question. But I think you did, and I'm sure as hell he did too."

"Mira once told me, when she got attacked by Bratva, over the phone she told me 'not to close down the way I did when he died'. I couldn't understand why she said that. I didn't shut down when J died, my ex, I'm not even sure I cried. But could she have ment Matteo?"

"Most likely. Your memory was erased after you came back, so there is a high chance that Mira saw you. They probably didn't tell her the whole truth though."

"How did he die?"

Blaze smiles. "Spoilers."

Seriously.

"Are you for real?"

"Get dresses. You have training in an hour and then you will meet a team."

"Team?"

"Yeah. They are trying to figure out who has the hydrogen bomb and I want you to join them since you have been working on it for a while as well."

"Well I can give you an answer to that question right away. Akela has it."

"I'm not so sure about that. There was an attack, he won, but it seems shady to me."

"How come this is my first time hearing that?"

"That's the interesting part. You were kept in the dark, but 2 days later one of you found out."

One of us found out and didn't tell the others, that doesn't add up. We were-

Oh my god.

"Nex?"

"Yes, the day he died."

And now it hit me. All those dots that I couldn't connect before, they all make sense now.

"He didn't die because he found out about my mother."

"No. He got a phone call on his burner phone that caused him to change the way he was going and his whole plan."