I'll be with you from dusk till dawn

Spilling the secrets.

Daryl's POV
The last few weeks have been a struggle for me as pushing away my regression is becoming a harder by the day. It started about two weeks ago when my head started to become foggy which was the first sign I needed to regress but I just couldn't do it not when I'm in a good place and I'm gonna risk being rejected by them. I started age regression ever since I move out of my parents house. My dad was an abusive alcoholic ever since my mother died when I was a kid and I've still got the scars. No one knows about any of this only my brother Merle, who was abused too but he didn't know I regressed. Ever since my brother died the other week it was like my breaking point, that's when my regression started to get harder to control. I mean I was able to do it whenever I needed to or wanted to cuz I lived alone and hadn't had anything to do really. So that meant I was able to keep it discreet as I was pretty antisocial. No one would have noticed it anyway I'm too good  at hiding it. But I hadn't regressed since the outbreak of this virus and now I'm with this group that I've been with for the majority of the new world I couldn't just tell them anything about my life. I put on this stubborn persona so no one would question me cause at the end of the day it was none of their business and plus how could I trust them properly there just strangers ho could betray us at any given chance.
There's really only two people that I trust the most out of the group and that was Rick and carol. We have become really close over these past couple of months, they are like the two people that I am closest to out of the whole group. I wanna tell them so bad but I just can't if I get rejected I'll have nothing left and it may not seem it, due to my stubbornness and short temper, but I'm Vulnerable and especially cause of my regression and that I've got no family left and being rejected by the people that I am closest too will be my breaking point. They give me a feeling of love, which I've never really had, and make me feel small. But before I reveal my secret to carol I want to tell Rick first because like we've become so close and he's the leader of the group and if he doesn't accept me I will just leave and I doubt he will accept me because he'll think I'm weird nd strange for doing that and then he will hate me. He would probably tell the group and they would mock me and talk badly about me behind my back and make my life a living hell. But I hope that that is not the case because he makes me feel safe knowing that he is there for me and we've become so close and he is pretty much alll I've got to live for otherwise my life would just be pointless. I'm not going to tell him yet I'll tell him when we're alone and I'm prepared cause at the moment I just want to enjoy what I have got going on.

I woke up with an intense migraine and my head feeling really foggy. I feel like I could just break down in tears because of the pain but I prevented any tears from escaping and decided to go back to sleep for a bit. I lay in bed and roll over hoping that if I sleep a little bit more the pain would ease down a bit praying that it's because I had a late night. I closed my eyes and I must have slept for an other hour or so before I wake up hoping that the pain has gone away or at least died down a bit nut that really was not the case. My migraine has intensified and it felt like someone was smashing my head with a hammer. My head had become more foggier and I was a bit more sensitive than usual. I hadn't realised that I was crying at first but I couldn't control it. I kept wiping my eyes until I had finally stopped crying. I got up, stretched and then grabbed my arrow. I checked to see if anyone was around but they all seemed to be outside or in there beds asleep still. I quickly make a bee line towards the room with all the medical supplies and grabbed the ibuprofen I took to before quickly exiting before anyone could see me and then headed outside to which everyone was sat down eating breakfast that carol had generously made but I wasn't hungry and plus I noticed I was feeling a bit nauseous. Carol spotted me and politely offered me a portion to which I respectfully responded with a no thank you, I'm not hungry but thanks for the offer, which my have been a lie but no one had to know.

Once everyone had finished eating their breakfast, Rick had announced to everyone what the plans for today was. Me, michonne and a few others were going out for supplies, the same group were going to kill the walkers at the fence, Maggie and Glenn were on look out, Rick was in the yard doing the gardening, carol and a few others were doing chores, Beth was looking after Judith and Carl was walking the halls checking everything/everyone. We all went off to get ready and we headed out into the towns. The ride there was quiet almost like an awkward silence but not that I cared my head was killing me. Once we had arrived at the supermarket we decided who was going to grab what and we split up and headed our own ways. Lucky for me I was in a bit further away from the rest of them and I had a toilet near me as I was at the back of the store. I could feel myself almost slipping so I decided to go toilet to prevent any accidents. My head was getting worse even though I took those pills but I've just got to get on with it. So I started grabbing some food and some stuff we needed from one isle. I then went to the next aisle to grab some more stuff when out of nowhere a walker grabbed me and pushed me to the ground. I smashed my head off the ground immediately causing a sharp pain in my head, my eyes started welling up with tears and I started crying but I managed to stab it in the head straight away. I don't know where it came from or why I wasn't careful but I was probably in my own world. I got up and realised I was still crying so I quickly wiped my eyes before anyone would hear or see me crying because I wasn't going to slip up now over some stupid mistake. I carry on searching for supplies for a while before I decided I've got enough stuff. I head back over to others and waited for a couple of minutes. Once we were all there we decided that we had gotten enough stuff for today and headed back to the prison.