Heyyyy to all my Exhale babies.
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April 8th, 12:30pm
Marley
Class has been so tiring more than ever, not that I've made it any easier for myself. I've been letting loose... a little too loose now that I think about it.
I let my emotions get the better of me. I owe a lot of people an apology and I have to start close to home.
My new therapist says I've abused my relationships and myself, and I need to take accountability for my grievances.
So that's what I'm doing. After going ghost for hours I'm gonna pop back up like the sky is blue again. I roll my eyes, sinking into shame. I was so nasty to Zuri and Roman.
I can't even look at them. What can I possibly say to ease the disrespect. I don't think they'd give me the time of day.
But still I made my way home. I think it's my turn to cook so I bought stuff for lasagna. I hope they're there. I'll start sweating in an empty apartment. I make my way through the lobby and up the elevator. By the time I get through the door. I know I'm alone, no piano music playing or weed burning.
They must still be at school. I put all my stuff away, and stuff the fridge with goodies. I'm still sticking to my plan of making dinner. But first I unwind and relax a little. I have some time before they head home.
So I spend it cleaning up my room and taking a much needed shower.
I bought some new spring candles, which I know Roman would love. He's such a flower boy. I light one and head over to the kitchen.
I must begin the meal prep... between me and you. I love cooking but hey. Don't tell anybody. I'm not a famous chef but I have some fun.
Zuri and I used to spend so much time in the kitchen. I miss those days. Life always seems simpler when you have no problems. We would spend everyday cooking up whatever we could think.
Now I'm making an apology meal. How the mighty have fallen...I shrug my shoulders shaking off the anxiety.
"All I have to do is tell them the truth."
I can do that.
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Marley has taken a step back to realize er wrong doings. She's finally ready to take accountability for her actions. Maybe they trio can be whole again and put her grief behind them. Maybe hurt hearts never heal find out sooooon.
Any Thoughts?
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