The Rose

COMING OUT

My mom never allowed me to skip school, unless I was in a comma, she always told me that I'll be missing out on a lot of work and that it's not that easy to catch up. Well this day I had to chance it.

I cut my arm with a razor to create pain so I could cry. I covered it with a bandage to avoid blood from dripping on my bed. I cried! Not from the physical pain I felt, I was hurting emotionally.

"Nelsea?" I heard my mom shout but I ignored her because I wanted her to come in and find me crying. "Aren't you late?" she shouted while coming into my bedroom. She glanced at me, for a while, "oh my baby, what's wrong?" she asked and I cried even more.

"I...I have period pains mama and they are bad." I lied, "weren't you on your periods last week?" she asked in confusion. "No I thought I was." I lied again. "May I please not go to school mama." I asked looking desperate.
Surprisingly she agreed. I was so excited I even felt like jumping high, but I couldn't, it would prove that I'm not sick at all. I continued playing sick. "I'll make you breakfast, you'll get it in the oven once you wake up." my mom said while leaving my room to go get ready for work.

I slept for a while after she left, woke up, ate my breakfast then watched movies. I had a lazy day, I didn't even feel like bathing but I ended up doing it. I went back to the TV room to watch more movies, and I heard someone knocking.

'Who could it be?' I thought to myself. I checked the window next to the door. I've never answered to a knock because sometimes it might be someone I'm avoiding so I can just ignore them. It was Liz.

Lizel and I haven't been close as we used to be in the past few weeks. I had a crush on her and as I know myself I decided that staying away from her would be the best way for me not to show her I love her hence I've distanced myself from her lately. Nonetheless our parents were not acknowledged of our situation.

I had no choice but to open for her. "oh it's you! Hi Liz" I grinned. "Hi Nel." she said while coming in,"Your mom asked my mum to drop me off, she said you are sick and she will be coming home late." "She just called, but she didn't tell me I should be expecting you." I said while closing the door.

Liz put a paper bag on the kitchen table, It was a Macdonald's paper bag, "oh you know I love food." I said and we both started laughing. "So Nel, how come you didn't make it to school today, I mean you don't look that bad and you're always there no matter how sick you are..." Liz proclaimed looking concerned. "I'm not sick." I admitted.

She seemed so confused so I thought I should elaborate, "well everyone knows now that I'm lesbian, and I'm not ready to face the world right now." "How did they? are you really? how come you didn't tell me?" she asked looking more confused.

"Yes Liz, I am lesbian." I said and she walked away heading upstairs, I took a burger and portion of chips which I assumed was mine and ate it like I was living freely, like a little girl with no problems in life.

Just when I finished eating my lunch Liz came in. "So tell me, how did everyone else know about your sexuallity?" she asked. "Uhm, it was on my status..." I regretted writing it. "I don't understand, if you don't want your mates to know then why did you post it?" she asked. "well it wasn't my intention to let everyone know."

I told liz everything that conducted me to writting that status.