When no one's watching

Chapter 21

Zayn's pov:

After we had hugged for a long time, we broke apart and just stared into each other's eyes.
Our hands were slightly brushing together and even if his hands were warm, it sent shivers down my spine.

"I mean it." Liam looked at me and I could see a tint of sadness in his eyes, the tint that was always there but just showing in his vulnerable moments.

"You meant what?" We both were whispering like we were interrupted the dark, warm summer night, only the chirping of the crickets audible.

"I love you, Zayn."

Even if I had already heard that seemingly so simple sentence coming from his mouth. It still seemed like every word was a treasured gift.
How he made those simple three words sound made my heart flutter.

For a moment I was incapable to answer, just admiring the beauty, the perfection of him in front of me.

"I love you too, Liam."
After I had managed to whisper back, his lips were brushing against mine.

His hands were softly pulling me closer to him by my waist.
I was holding the nape of his neck, my eyes closed and my lips smiling against his.

Our lips were moving perfectly together, like they were made for each other.

As we broke apart, we rested our foreheads together and our hands brushed together again.
He held my hands and they were fitting in mine like it was meant to be.

Liam's pov:

Holding Zayn's smaller, cold hand in mine made me feel like time had stopped, just for us.

As I slowly opened my eyes I could feel Zayn's soft breathing brush against my jaw.

His eyes were still closed and his long eyelashes feathered down his cheekbones.

It was in that moment that I fully realized that I had fallen deeply in love with the boy in front of me.

Zayn ripped me out of my thoughts by looking at me questioning with his hazel eyes.
I guessed that he had asked something and I didn't hear him.

"Sorry, I wasn't listening...what did you say?"
"I asked if you wanna stay over?"

I tried to hide my giddiness about it but I wasn't very good at it and grinned at him. I guessed that I looked very creepy.

"Of course, if that's alright for you?"
He nodded while smiling at me and grabbed my hand.

His hand was cold as ice even if the night was extremely warm.

"Are you okay? You're hands are freezing!" I turned him around so he faced me and he just shot me a quick smile.

"It's alright, Li. I always have cold hands." He chuckled before leading me up the stairs.

"Have you eaten yet Zayn?"
I knew that I probably shouldn't have asked but I needed to know.

He froze for a moment and his grip got tighter before he shook his head slowly.

"I'm good, Li I'm not hungry right now. Are you hungry? I can cook you something ?"

I smiled at him fondly.
How much I admired him...he had no idea.

"No thanks, if you don't eat I won't either."

He just nodded and continued to walk upstairs.
As we arrived in his room I looked around curiously.
I never had been in his room before so I looked at the whole room.

"I'm so sorry it's so messy in here...you don't have to stay."
He looked at me with disappointed and hopeful eyes.
Of course I wouldn't leave because his room wasn't tidied...

"No, of course I'll stay! It doesn't matter at all, don't worry."
He smiled at me and it seemed like he was relieved.

He then let go of my hand and quickly picked up all the stuff laying around.

After a while, we settled down on his bed and he asked if I wanted to sleep in the guest room or stay.
I decided to stay with him as long as he was okay with it and so we got ready for bed.

It wasn't late at all, only 9pm but I was feeling completely drained.
But something was different than earlier that day. My heart felt like it was working again and my mind felt free.

I smiled to myself when Zayn got up to switch off the lights.
As he trailed back to the bed, I eyed him.

He was hidden under sweatpants and an oversized hoodie but his thin, pale hands were still showing. His wrist bone was sticking out and also did he look completely exhausted.
As I looked closer I could see how tired he looked, there were dark circles under his eyes.

As Zayn started to notice that I basically stared at him, I quickly averted my gaze and patted on the space next to me, indicating him to lay there.

Only the small bedside lamp was lighting up the room in a dimmed light.

He also switched off the small light and for a few moments, we were just laying there silently in the complete dark.

But soon my eyes got used to the dark and I could see the outlines of Zayn laying next to me.

Even if it was dark, I could see that Zayn was cold. Which was very surprising, it was the mid of summer and the temperature in Zayn's room was rather high.

"Are you cold, Zaynie?"
He turned his head in my direction and mumbled.
"Yeah kinda but I'm good."

I softly pulled him closer to me but waited to see his reaction to look if he was comfortable with it.

After a few seconds, he scooted closer and I could feel his small body laying in front of mine.

We were spooning and I could feel him shaking slightly.
I didn't know if it was because he was cold or because he was uncomfortable.

Eventually, he stopped shaking and snuggled closer to me.
I was holding him tightly and trying to warm him.

After a while I could hear his breath getting steady.
I could've listened to his breathing and our heartbeats syncing for the rest of my life. Zayn sleeping was the most peaceful and precious thing ever.

I held him close, not letting go a single second.
I pressed a small kiss onto his head and mumbled a "goodnight love" into his raven hair.

My hands were around his waist and he held onto them even in his sleep.
I smiled at him before my eyelids got heavier and I also fell asleep having him in my arms.