"Dear Yoongi,
I've always thought how lovely it is to be bored with someone. Not bored of them but being bored with them. Like, I have nothing to say but can I quietly exist with you today?
My day is gloomy and slow, do you want to count the hours with me?
We don't have to be interesting or entertaining all the time to keep each other company.
We can just be completely ourselves. We can just be comfortable.
The truth is, the loneliness is creeping up on me. Those thoughts I try so hard to bury starts eating me alive when I'm trying to sleep.
Sometimes, I'm just so freaking tired and my mind is just so frustrated but I just can't let my frustrations out because if I do, I feel like I'll only create more mess. So I stay silent, I wanna distract my mind from my own thoughts so I go on my phone but I'm still tired.
So I put my phone down to be present in the real world but at the same time the real world is somehow, somewhere eating me up inside, and then suddenly I'm now at a point where- neither I wanna look at my phone nor do I wanna be present in the real world.
It's like I would be at peace only when I go extinct or in other words, I just don't wanna feel anything but I'm feeling something that's bothering me. Maybe, dying is the only way it out.
***
His grip tightened around the diary in his hand. Waking up he realized that he might have passed out on the ground last night. Something that would've made him grumpy but not this time.
For a second, it felt normal. As if last night never happened.
As if he left his room now, he would see his beautiful girlfriend swaying her hips on the music while cooking him some breakfast as the delicious smell hit his nose but was sadly greeted by silence.
Oh, what he would do to feel those 2 seconds again. He just wanted to feel something.
After last night, it seems as if it wasn't only Y/n who left him. A part of him left with her as well. His happiness. Those cute giggles that once made the house seem alive was now missing.
It felt as if it wasn't the sun, which made his life brighter. It was that dazzling gummy smile that was so much similar to his.
He kept the diary away from his reach, not wanting to see that stubborn stain of blood on it that was constantly reminding him of his loss.
His mind screamed at him to read it but his heart was telling him a different story. That stupid thing that was beating in his chest was aching just by the thought of touching the journal.
The truth to be told. For once, 'The Min Yoongi' wasn't ready. He wasn't ready to find out the harsh reality. She is-- was someone and maybe the only one who could make him feel alive and grounded.
He sighed, deeply. No sooner than he got up from the floor, the door bell of the house rang three times.
He himself doesn't know why;
But he almost ran all his way down, thinking it was
Y/n. He didn't want her to wait. His mind told him the truth. He knew that she was gone.
It was his heart, which told him to just hang on that little string of hope that was left.
Even if it was pointless.
YOU ARE READING
Please Remember Me
Фанфик"When life goes south and you don't know what to cry about, just take out your journal and scribble everything out." People say that we only value something when we lose it. Humans have the tendency to not value someone who values them and thake the...
