Royal Ace Lounge

㉕It Doesn't Feel Normal

 
Taehyung blew on his hot chocolate, his gloomy eyes riveted on the little ripples he created.

In need of a friend, he had arranged to meet with Jimin before work, and there they were, sitting at a quiet cafe near the Royal Ace Lounge.

Jimin regarded him with a notion of doleful sympathy as he let everything he heard sink in. He couldn’t get used to seeing him like this; a new sort of sadness had struck Taehyung, robbing him of the usual twinkle in his eyes and the perkiness in his voice.

He seemed truly depressed.

Jimin sighed, then sipped at his coffee. “I thought everything was going well.”

“I know. Me too. He can’t be so clingy one day and end it the next. It doesn’t make sense.”

“Maybe how you acted when he kissed you at the bar bothered him more than he admitted.”

“He said it wasn’t that. And I apologized, anyway.”

Jimin held onto his silence as he couldn’t conjure another reason for Jungkook’s behavior. “I don’t know then.”

“Me neither. Why do I feel like this, Chim? I hate it.”

“Because you want to keep having sex with him while he doesn’t. It’s normal.”

“It doesn’t feel normal,” Taehyung uttered. As if a rock had been wedged into his chest, it felt so heavy and tight since the moment he woke up, and a mantle of sullenness had circled his existence that held his smile captive. “It feels awful. I don’t understand me.”

“You should distract yourself with work, Tae. I’m sure it’ll pass. I mean, it was nothing more than a fuck, right?”

The answer was yes, but Taehyung couldn’t vocalize the simple word. Because if it were truly just a fuck, why did he feel so dejected and depressed?

“Tae.” Jimin reached out and cupped his hand to pull him out of his overthinking. “Is there a chance this wasn’t just a fuck for you?”

Taehyung’s head hung over his slouched shoulders. “I don’t know. I want to say no, but... I don’t understand why I feel like this.”

“Maybe you like him. If that’s the case, you should tell him.”

“Tell him what? ‘Hey, Jungkook, maybe I like you and I want us to keep fucking to see if I’m right?’ He’ll think I’m crazy.”

“Yeah, that doesn’t sound so good,” Jimin said with a half chuckle. “Then, just be patient. Let’s see how it goes. Maybe tomorrow you won’t feel like this anymore.”

“I hope so.” Taehyung’s chest bloated with a long breath, and he expelled the air sharply. “Anyway. How are things with Yoongi?”

“Great.” An instant gleam danced up in Jimin’s eyes at the mention of his name. “I think we’re dating, even if we haven’t said it officially. And the sex is mind-blowing.”

Taehyung’s pouty lips formed a slight smile; they couldn’t lift higher, despite his happiness for his friend. “I’m really glad for you, Chim. You continue having sex with customers, though.”

“Yeah. To be honest, I don’t want to. It feels like cheating, even if I know it’s just work.”

“What does he think about it?”

“We haven’t discussed it. Maybe that’s why we haven’t put a label on us yet.”

“You don’t need a label. As long as you’re happy as things are, nothing else matters.”