"He's down" Lando said as he stood next to me on the balcony. "Thanks" I smiled.
And then there was this silence again, something that never happened between us before everything that happened.
I sighed as I looked at the view. I tried to ignore how good he smelled, how much I wanted to forget everything and just kiss him.
I hate that there is nobody else. I hate that I couldn't hate him.
"Rae" he broke the silence. "I miss you, a lot"
"I bet you do" I mumbled.
"Do you think you can ever give me another chance?"
I chuckled a little. "I gave you enough chances, don't you think?"
He said nothing to do, guess he agreed with me.
"Why didn't you tell me you were pregnant?"
I snapped my head to him. "How do you know I was pregn-"
"Juliette told me" he explained.
Juliette. He never called her that. Him and Jace always called her Jules.
Interesting.
"Because you were quite distant, maybe I was a little scared that you didn't want that, maybe I wasn't ready either" I shrugged.
I wanted to tell him, but then I had a miscarriage.
I don't know why I didn't tell him. I didn't want him to worry or be sad, I didn't want to hurt his feelings.
So I dealt with it all alone.
"I wanted nothing more than have a family with you, Rae" he said softly. "I can't sleep since I lost you, can't stop thinking about you"
"You stopped thinking about me when you were in her, or were you thinking about me while you were fucking her?"
Another silence fell over us.
He didn't think of me, obviously.
"Please Rae, I don't want you to fall for someone else"
"Lando, sto-" I wanted to tell him to stop this, because every time he said stuff like that, my heart skipped a beat.
But a knock on my door interrupted me.
I don't know who it was, but I was so happy someone decided to knock on my door.
"Excuse me" I said as I walked back in the room, Lando followed me to the door. I opened it, looked at beautiful ocean blue eyes.
Max Verstappen.
"Oh, sorry I didn't know you had company" he said. But he knew. I told him I was going to dinner with Lando, so he probably suspected he would be here.
"He was just leaving anyways" I said, looked at Lando. "I wasn't"
"You were" I nodded.
Lando frowned. "What is he doing here?"
"I am just checking on her" Max answered instead. "Making sure she wouldn't do anything stupid"
He was making sure I wouldn't do Lando.
Lando snorted. "Okay yeah she's fine, you can leave"
"No, you can leave Lando" I said, holding the door open for him. "Good night"
Lando looked at me, to Max and back at me. He scoffed and walked out without saying anything else.
He was probably gonna fuck Violet in only a few hours.
Max walked in and I closed the door behind him. "Thank you" I said.
"I thought you would need some help" he laughed a little.
I acted a bit offended. "What? Don't you think I can handle myself?"
"Would you have kissed him if I didn't show up?" He tilted his head, smirked a little.
"No" I rolled my eyes.
Yes, definitely.
"Sure" he laughed. "You wanna watch a movie?"
I thought he would make sure Lando left and go back to his room after that.
But he didn't, he actually wanted to spend time with me.
"Yes" I nodded.
I also wanted to spend time with him. Felt comfortable around him.
We used to date for 2 years, but I used him, hurt him. I regretted that so much.
Wish I never left him, I could have a entire family with Max right now.
But then Jace wouldn't be here, and he was my everything. The only good thing Lando did, was give me Jace.
I wondered if he ever loved me. Was he ever in love with me?
