“Pretty weather, pretty weather, no matter what the day may be. Shiny blue skies, cloudy gray skies, and skies that rain down snow...” That’s the song I would have been singing. If I was five again. If I was the happy-go-lucky kid I used to be. If I wasn’t already screaming with rage inside. But that wasn’t the case here. I wasn’t the happy-go-lucky kid I once was. I wasn’t five anymore, I’m nineteen. I was stuck in the middle of nowhere, in the pouring rain, with no cell signal, no cash, a broken down pick-up truck, and I was so pissed off the hammering wind and rain fit my mood like my beat up converse fit my feet. After a while of sitting there trying to get a signal I finally gave up, got out of the truck, kicked the damn thing, screamed; “Stupid piece of trash!”, and walked off. Did I know where I was going? Not at all. Did I care? Not one bit. Was this one of the stupidest things I could have done? Ha! When you read this story, you’ll think I’m insane. I suppose I should start off with how it all began. It all started with the birth, and death, of my first child...
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“Come on Dani you can do it!” I could hear my mom trying to scream over my own screams. The amount of pain I was in at this moment was excruciating. I felt like I was going to die. “Come on Danielle it’s almost over!” I could hear the doctor trying to calm me. Nice try fella, it ain’t workin’! I thought irritated. “Almost there!” Cried one of the nurses. After a few more minutes it was all over. I was still in incredible pain, but not so much pain I felt I was going to die. I was covered from head to toe in sweat. My face was completely red, I had been crying, and I was exhausted. I looked over at my mother and she was smiling at me with happy tears flowing from her eyes. “You did it Dani,” she smiled. “You did it, you gave birth to your first child.” I smiled and hugged my mom.
“Danielle,” the doctor came over to me holding a bundle. “You have given birth to a beautiful baby boy.” He handed me my baby and all I could do was smile and cry happy tears. He was crying his cute little baby cry and my motherly instincts kicked in. “Shh don’t cry baby. Don’t cry, it’s okay. Mommy’s here sweetie.” I soothed my baby boy. “What are you going to name him?” The nurse asked me. I honestly hadn’t thought about that before. Now at the moment when I had to name him, I didn’t know. “I don’t know,” I said still crying happy tears rocking him back and forth slowly. “I never really thought about what to name him.” I said looking down at my beautiful baby again and whipping my tears away before they fell again. I couldn’t think straight. How could a baby a beautiful as this possibly be given one name? Names were running all through my head. It was so hard to just pick one.
The name Nicholas popped into my head. Nicholas. I liked it. Nick for short. “I think his name will be Nicholas.” I say smiling. “Nicholas, what a lovely name.” My mother cooed. “Alright then,” the nurse said smiling. “His name’s Nicholas... Nicholas what?” She asked smiling. Wondering about a middle name. I thought for a moment and then said, “Allan, Nicholas Allan. That’s his name.” I said smiling. I look down at him again. “My baby, my beautiful baby.” I say tears beginning to appear again. Everything that had happened before didn’t matter now. “Let’s go home.” My mother says smiling.
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