Beyond Those Eyes. ঌB.K

꒰ა If Only ໒꒱

We were going to leave for out flight to Los Angeles tomorrow morning. My head was still in a spiral. Wondering if me and Bill were ever going to work this out.

I sighed and took my suitcases to place them outside together with our mom's. "Both of you! Breakfast!" I heard my mom yell out from downstairs. "Yes?! Hold on mom!" I said walking down the stairs with the cases in hand. "Hey hey, let me help." Georg says making me smile.

"Oh? Since when were you so nice?" I asked Georg with a chuckle. "Shut up.." he said with tears in his eyes. "Wait, are you crying?" I asked Georg, placing down my suitcases on the side of our staircase. "No. I-im not." He said sternly.

"Awee, you are!" I said holding his face. He was my brother and he wasn't the type of guy to show us how he felt, so i hugged him. "Its okay, I'll make sure to update you. And if i forget, you know how mom is.." i said burying his face into my neck. Tears came streaming down after the hug, which was Georgs weakness.

He quickly pulled himself up and we headed over to the kitchen. "Hey mom.." i said with a smile on my face. Georg kept silent. "Go eat now, wont you both?" Our mother said. "Georg, honey. Are you sure you're going to be fine?" Our mother asked Georg. "Mhm! I'm going to be fine.." Georg said with his voice blocked.

My mom nodded to the both of us and left to go to get groceries to leave Georg with. She was going to work online for the time we were in LA so she wasn't going to have much problem with her jobs.

It was still raining but not so heavily. Most of it turned to fog and cold breeze and i took it as a chance to relax and give some time to myself.

I changed my clothes and headed out to take a walk, i find it helps clear the mind. I took a stroll throughout my neighborhood and onto the towns park. Specifically the park where me and Bill had each others first kiss at.

I felt a different rush of mixed emotions pounding throughout layers on my chest as i took a step inside. But it was the most beautiful place and i couldn't resist.

I pulled myself together and breathed in the calm air along with the morning dew. It was a peaceful Saturday morning and there weren't many people roaming throughout the streets as it was a rest day.

I passed by the treehouse. It looked untouched, together with the playground and the swings.

I passed a few flower shrubs and saw something that reminded me of Bill. Hibiscus flowers, in a beautiful shade of deep red. I plucked a few and held them in my hand as i continued my walk.

After an hour or few, i went back home and planted the flowers into a medium ranged vase. I sighed as i took one look at them with my eyes tearing up. Suddenly felt a cold hand on my shoulder. Georg, checking up on me.

"You okay? Tom called earlier and told me everything." Georg said patting my back and ruffling through my hair. "Oh, uhm.." i said looking at the floor, holding back any tears that were soon to fall from my eyes.

"Hey, hey..its okay." Georg said with a comforting hand on my back. I stayed silent as my eyes travelled from the floor up to Georgs eyes. That was all he needed.

He hugged me and whispered, "you're a tough one, know that?" Georg said patting my head.

"I have tears in my eyes over a boy i never dated..whats tough about that?" I say. "You're still here aren't you? About to move to one of the most popular cities to start off your career. Everything about you, is tough, Audri." Georg responded making me smile. He pinched my cheeks while pulling away from the hug.

He was the only person capable of calming me down and reminding me that i needed to stay strong. We always had a strong bond as siblings and i was thankful to have him.

I went off to my room to take some time and rethink things. Did Bill think i was a mistake?

I took my headphones off of my desk and place them on my head. I took a sigh and jumped on my bed, head facing down into my pillow. "Fake Plastic Trees" by Radiohead blasting into my ears.

Tears streaming down my pillow. With my cries buried into the covers of my bed, preventing anyone from hearing it.

What was i thinking? I blamed myself for the argument, i couldn't bear it. I dwelled on it, and i couldn't stop myself. I was the reason, that we might end. That was all on me.

If only i found the right words to announce the news to him that day. Or if maybe, i just gathered up enough courage to tell him earlier. But i couldn't, i couldn't go back. I couldn't change anything, and that felt disgusting.

My heart was in the bottom of my stomach. Suddenly the tears paused and i stopped crying my heart out. I felt numb, i couldn't move.

Eventually, i took a rest and fell asleep.

I woke up with a heavy heart and multiple knocks on my bedroom door. "Shit.." i say walking over to see who was calling. "Yeah?" I said.

It was Georg. "Hey, mom wanted to arrange a movie marathon so we could spend time together. Before..you know." Georg said sternly. "Okay, I'll be there. Calm down and stop thinking about tomorrow alright?" I said to him. Georg nodded and told me he'd wait downstairs for me.

I went to my bathroom and looked at myself in the mirror. Disappointed in myself. I took a few deep breathes and took a long and cold a shower.

I felt emotionless, still completely numb. I finished and placed my pajamas on. Quickly drying my hair before i headed on downstairs, making sure my eyes weren't bloated so it wasn't obvious i cried.

I stepped out my door and heard a few voices coming from outside our house. I rushed downstairs to confused and curious to see who. No one but Georg and our mother.

I sat down with not much energy, crossing my legs and patiently waited for the movie. I heard a few more familiar voices. They were deeper, clearer.

My eyes moved from the floor, to our wall. Observing if i were just hearing things or if they were real. I shuddered under my breath, and looked behind me.

"Bill..?"

Authors Note:
Hi! I really liked this chapter, it was the most realistic one I've made in my opinion. Also haven't had the time to reread this so if there are any grammar or spelling mistakes, that would be expected! 🥲

Anywayss, hope you guys enjoy!