LOVED BY THE MASOCHIST [BxB]

Chapter 21

REVE

I was four when my father take all my toys and burned them. He replaced it with guns and knives, forced me to learn using those things and make it my new toys. Mas nauna pa yata akong natutong bumaril kesa sa matutong magsulat.

I never experienced a memorable childhood. All I can remember is the feeling of my first wounds, first shot, first kill and the scars I got from the hard training sessions with father. At first I was happy that he is giving me so much of attention, that he is teaching me things that he's expert of. But not until, I realized a thing.. father took my freedom from me. That father treats me not as his child but a descendant that must be honed and prepared to fulfill his goals.

I remembered crying and begging mother to take me and stop father from teaching me those things, I remembered wishing for the times to came back where everything is easy and safe. But it all did nothing, mother did nothing. She's a puppet, she only follows what dad commands her. She doesn't have her own decisions. Later, I learned that mother is just like me, a caged bird who can't do anything but stay and obey.

I was seven when father told me about the organization. Father told me everything, all his hardships, strengths, success, and loyalty. Our ancestors are one of the founders of it, ilang taon nang pinaninindigan ng pamilya namin ang posisyon bilang eagle. We're the renowned families of rangers, and we must justify and stand for this title.

I was ten when father sent me on Russia for the training camp. I was a candidate for the position of eagle, and I need to compete and win over a hundred of contengers to get the position. The training camp will last 8years. Some candidates backed off because they can't stand the harsh and extreme training sessions for almost a decade. In the end, there were only three candidates for the position of eagle who lasted.

I envy those children I saw on the streets, they had such a very wide smile on their faces and a bright flicker on their eyes. I badly want be like them, to live normally and just play all day. Looking back, I always wished a thing.. to father bring me out ang buy me some ice cream, but it stayed a wish even until now.

The training camp ended and I've made a lot of friends there. They we're also top candidates like me and it made my boring life to experience events for the first time. I am a top candidate, that title gives me the courage to take back my freedom and completely ignored my father's commands. Sobrang asam na asam ako sa aking kalayaan.

I was fifteen when I flight to the Philippines and stayed there with the support of my pals. Inasikaso ko rin ang pamana sa akin ng abuelo ko and get it. Nagpatayo ako ng bahay sa murang edad gamit ang perang yun. Nag-aral ako sa bansang hindi ko naman sinilangan. But what shocked me is how this country feels like home. Everyone is so welcoming, the people still managed to smile through their hard days and some even offered help when they're clearly out of it.

And three years after that, I meet this guy. He's a prince, a beautiful prince, Jhail Nikolai Ivanov. I had no clue why did the lion sent him to my house. I was afraid to approach Jhail, he seemed so fragile and attractive. But days passed and we got closer to each other. He is more than a friend to me. I know a lot about him and he knows a lot about me. It was my first time having someone that close, someone whom I can share my bed with, someone whom I can cuddle with, someone whom I can run into, whom I can cried on. Jhail makes me feel complete, he's like a piece of me that I really need to feel better.

Then, something happened. The lion threatened me. Every candidates know that I am more than suitable and I deserved the position than anyone else. Alam ng lahat na ako ang pinaka-karapat-dapat, pero desisyon parin ng lion ang masusunod. It wasn't fair, it wasn't. Dahil dun nagbago ang lahat. I talked to Jhail and asked him to stopped his father on his decision but Jhail did nothing. He didn't take an action, and that's when I learned that he too, wants the setup.