Wesley Gray
I fell asleep after the fucking, and now we're sitting in my room in silence. We're all staring at Troy.
He lets out a heavy breath and runs his fingers through his hair. "She said she's in love with me"
My heart stops, I swear.
"I needed some space to think about things. I don't have those feelings for her, but she was my best friend. I never knew she felt anything more than physical attraction. If i did i never would have slept with her to begin with. I needed time to think about what to say to her, to you guys. I didn't want to tell you" The honesty in his voice rips out my heart.
Because he didn't want to tell me. And i think this is a pretty big fucking secret. But it doesn't matter. I can't ever get the words out, and he doesn't care about me-
"I care a lot about you, Wes" Troy's voice cuts through my thoughts. "Your feelings are the only ones I want to protect. I didn't care about turning her down, I cared about telling you this after what we shared. And then I shut down. So I left. I ran"
"Like a coward" Jase adds, shaking his head and leaning back against the headboard. "You do realize it's more than just Wes right? There's us too. We're all in a relationship. No we don't fuck each other but our feelings matter too. You hurt wes, and you're driving a wedge between us."
"I didn't think of it that way" Troy murmurs.
"You left us to take care of your fuck up" Zane adds, "And we did, because we care about him and want to. But we don't want to deal with your shit. You need to end any sort of relationship with her, and you need to do it today"
I agree with them. I don't voice it, but I lean into Zane, resting my head on his shoulder. His arm loops around my shoulders.
"Okay" Troy looks at me. "Anything else?"
"I don't forgive you" the words flow out of me, and Troy nods slowly. "But i don't want space anymore"
He nods, and stands from the chair rounding the bed. He leans over Zane, and scops me up. Hoisting me up, my legs latch around his waist and my head buried into his neck. His arms circle my body, and I feel like climbing into bed.
I'm in his lap, and I feel other hands on me. The boys.
—-
I'm still in the process of forgiving Troy, but we have a bigger problem now.
I've been throwing up the last week. We think it happened. So we're at the pack doctor, sitting in the waiting room area. Zane is calm, and gives me space. Jase is pacing, running his fingers through his hair.
Troy? Is clingy as fuck. He has some part of him touching me at all times. If it was up to him, I'd be in his lap.
Before long a nurse is taking us back to a small room. She has me sit on a table, and does a quick check, and then she's sending someone in to take my blood. They do it fairly quickly, and then we're waiting.
Since Troy is the alpha, they have it on a quick order. We only have to wait like 15 minutes. Jase starts pacing again, and Zane's leg is bouncing as he watches his brother pace.
My nerves are high, my skin is itchy, and I don't want this. But I think a small part of me is...excited? I have a lot of my own issues I need to resolve, and work through. So having a kid is scary, but having someone I'll love regardless? Someone to raise and give a happy life too? Sounds.. Exciting.
"Good morning everyone, I'm Dr. Erikson" An older man comes in, he has short gray hair and is about the same height as Jase. "I'm under the impression you guys are here to figure out if there's a baby?" he asks, sitting in the chair doctors sit in. He flips through a folder he had in his arms, and nods. "Looks like there is a positive blood test."
My heart takes off, beating quickly. Jase stops his pacing, and he looks at me. They all do, actually.
"Should I give you a moment to process?" The Dr asks, and Troy says something, but I don't hear him. Everything gets fuzzy, and it feels like I'm underwater.
I pull my knees to my chest, and start rocking as the room starts to spin. It gets hard to breathe, and I know the boys are here, talking to me. But I can't hear them, I can't feel them.
I can't feel anything.
—
My eyes feel heavy. Everything feels heavy. I push myself up, into a sitting position as I take in my surroundings. I'm in my room at the pack house, and I'm alone. My brows furrow, and I slip out of bed. I'm in the same sweats as I was earlier, as I make my way out to the living area.
I walk into a conversation, which I only know because everyone stops talking and looks at me. Jase is up first, coming over and wrapping me up in his arms. "Hey baby" his voice is gentle, and hugs me. After that, he pulls me with him to the couch, pulling me into his lap. My side is against his front, and his arms loop around my waist.
I pull my knees to my chest, glancing around the room. "I'm pregnant?"
It seems like everyone lets out a breath, and then Troy is talking. "Yeah, 4 weeks along. It's still very early."
"Wow" the word leaves me in a heavy whisper. I lean my head against Jase's shoulder, and he squeezes me close to him.
"You had a panic attack when he told us," Jase says.
"You passed out," Zane adds.
"What.. are we gonna do?"
"You have to take some vitamins. The doctor gave us them. And it's like any normal pregnancy I guess."
"If he chooses to keep it" Zane says, and Troy shakes his head running his fingers through his hair.
"You don't think I should have that choice" I voice, and Jase murmurs.
"That's what we were talking about before you came out" he leans his head against mine, and i nod.
"It's not that I don't think you should have a choice. I just think you should have the baby either way, and if you choose to not be part of their life then that's your choice" Troy says, slipping his hands into his pockets.
"You think I'd abandon my baby?" my brows furrow, and I shake my head. "I think I want it, so I don't think we need to have this argument. Although you're an idiot, and i think you're a bit fucked in the head" i snap, squeezing my legs closer to my body.
"But i guess if i won't have your baby, you could go ask your friend" that was a low blow, but the words flow out before i can think to stop them.
Troy's spine stiffens, and he glances at the boys. "I wouldn't do that to you, sweetheart"
"But you'd what? Leave me and take our baby?"
"I never said I'd leave you"
"It was implied. You think we'd stay together and what? You'd just raise the baby alone? No. We'd split up. So not only did you fuck me, then leave me for a day. You'd take my baby, and leave me. Then you know what Troy? Just fucking leave me!" my voice becomes louder, and i stand up at some point.
"I don't want that sweetheart-"
"Sure sounds like you fucking do!" I yell, tears filling my eyes and flowing down my cheeks.
Troy steps into my space, running his thumbs over my cheeks, wiping my tears. He holds my face in his hands, his brows pinched. "I don't want to leave you. I want you. I was just thinking out loud. I guess I wasn't thinking correctly, and I am sorry. I'm so sorry sweetheart. I shouldn't have suggested that."
I nod slowly, letting my eyes fall shut. Troy pulls me into his body, holding me close to him.
A/N
Ooof. Troy really is fucking up. He needs to think before he acts, that's for sure. What are your thoughts??
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