We're Still Human

Chapter 27: Let Bygones Be Bygones...For Now

I'm lying in bed, staring at the ceiling, watching shadows shift as cars pass by outside. The silence in my room feels too loud, but my thoughts are louder. Nadia's words keep swirling in my head, refusing to leave me alone.

"We were best friends... and what I did was the shittiest thing anyone had ever done to someone, and you didn't deserve that."

Best friends. That's what we used to be before everything fell apart. I can still see us sneaking off after curfew, sharing secrets that felt like they'd always be safe between us. We trusted each other completely back then. And then she ruined it. She ruined me.

The rumors, the whispers in the hallways, the laughter when Yahya kissed me in front of everyone-it all comes rushing back. My stomach twists at the memory. Nadia was the first person I told I was bisexual, and she used it against me. My best friend.

But today-today she apologized. And I don't know how to feel about it. The Nadia standing in front of me now doesn't seem like the same Nadia who stabbed me in the back all those months ago. Or maybe she is, and I'm just too tired to see it.

I roll onto my side, squeezing my pillow tighter, trying to push the thoughts away. I have Kendall now. Earlier, she kissed me softly and promised that whatever I decide, she'll be there. With her, I feel safe-cared for in a way I haven't felt in a long time.

But what if I'm not ready to decide? What if I can't?

My phone buzzes on the nightstand. I hesitate, thinking it's probably Kendall checking in on me again, but when I reach for it, Nadia's name flashes across the screen.

I know you're not ready to talk yet. I don't blame you. But I meant what I said earlier. I'm not that same person, Yas. And I'm sorry, really.

I stare at the message, my thumb hovering over the reply button. I want to respond, but at the same time, I don't. My mind is torn between the anger still burning inside me and the small flicker of hope that maybe-just maybe-she's telling the truth.

I toss the phone back onto the bed and pull the blankets up around me, closing my eyes. Maybe tomorrow I'll have some answers. Maybe tomorrow I'll finally know what I really want.

But the good thing about tomorrow, is that it doesn't have to be a reminder of yesterday.

***

I shoot another three as Kendall watches in the distance, supporting Nadia and I as we battle Sofia. It's been one hell of a week, and after some much needed conversation, I've decided to focus on becoming captain, and if not that, at least vice. Nadia and I also haven't had the chance to talk all week, and if I'm being honest, I don't have the heart or capacity to talk to her about us right now. Not when there's so much at stake.

Nadia sprints to get the ball for me, passing it to me. "Eyes on the prize, Nothando, threes aren't enough."

I nod. "My layups are fine, you on the other hand, need to work on defending."

Nadia rolls her eyes, snatching the ball from me. "Your defending is just as good as Sofia's, very stale and brittle."

I steal the ball from her. "And your humor is just like Audrey's, flat and sour."

Nadia huffs as Stacy comes over, asking for the ball. I give it to her and watch Stacy go in on layups, trying to see if she's able to handle Audrey and her side burns quick enough today.

"This might not be the time but, I know you saw my message and I-"

"You're right, Nads, not the time," I whisper, avoiding eye contact.

"I don't need you to reply to the message right now, I just want to know if you and I are okay for today," she explains. "I don't want this to be awkward."