We Are Far from Heaven✅

EP 15 When he finally knew

"Bpen alai kaawng meung (what's wrong with you)?" Phuwin looked at him with confusion all over his face. Phuwin didn't expect Pond to hug him. His hands were hanging awkwardly while Pond deepened his hug. 

"Gu khor tord (I'm sorry). I'm sorry for all the grievances that I've caused you. Gu rak meung na. rak maak maak (I love you, I love you a lot)" Phuwin's eyes widen at Pond's confession. Pond releases him and caressed his face.

"Let's start over again...na?" Phuwin stared at Pond's sincere face. He didn't know what to say. His brain couldn't register this new side of Pond. Just yesterday he forced him to watch him with his hia and now he is asking to start over?! He could feel the heat of anger flowing through his veins but one look at his face, he couldn't... he couldn't even vent it out. Not with the look Pond was giving him. Perhaps a part of him does love him. 

Even with what happened all these while he still... 

He couldn't believe what he was telling himself. After all that had happened, he could still love him? He tried to stop the hysterical laughter from bubbling out, forcing himself to take deep breaths.

"I... I need time" Phuwin said. He couldn't understand why his voice soften just like that when he saw the desperation on Pond's face.

"Phu..." Pond started while gently clasping his hand. 

"Please... give me time." Phuwin said with his eyes closed. Pond could see Dunk shaking his head at a distance. Joong was standing just behind him. 

"I'll wait for you then. Please think of me." Pond whispered before placing a kiss at his temple. Dunk gave Pond's shoulder a squeeze when passed by him. 

"Go with him" Dunk whispered to Joong, asking him to keep a look out for Pond before he walked towards Phuwin. 

Phuwin felt familiar arms around his shoulders before he placed his head on Dunk's shoulder. He didn't know why tears started to fall once he felt Dunk's hand stroking the back of his head. 

"I want to hate him, hia. I want to hate him so much but I can't. Why can't I? Why is he making this so hard? Why did he suddenly change?" Phuwin sobbed. 

"He didn't change, Phuwin. It's the bane of being a Nephalem. Now that he is more in sync, his demonic side is taking a rest. P'Pond is still P'Pond. He is still your mate" Dunk continued to  stroke his hair.  

"I made a deal with him, hia. It was just a deal. Now I'm... I'm lost.... " I'm so lost...It was what Pond wanted all along- that I could never be able to live without him. Phuwin thought that he meant the way he used his body but he didn't think that he meant his heart as well. How could his heart have more than one? He didn't want to lose his hia. Phuwin squeezed Dunk in a tight hug. 

" Don't leave me, hia. Don't leave, Phuwin." 

"Hia will never leave Phuwin. hia yu kang kang Phuwin dtor lott bpai (I'll always be by your side)" Dunk's words comforted Phuwin, no matter how wrong it felt for him to cling onto him. 

"Don't judge yourself, Phuwin. Hia has never blamed you for anything. Never will. Don't use what's normal to judge our circumstances. Don't try to fit into anyone's shoe. We are no longer in the Tangsakyuen clan." Phuwin took a shuddering breath before he nodded and breathed in Dunk's calming scent. 

***

Joong was hugging a sulking Pond. Joong didn't know what more he could do. Pond was clinging onto him as he blame himself for all the wrong he had done to Phuwin. He heard his bedroom door opened. He heard Dunk sigh before tapping on Joong's shoulder to move. Dunk took his place. Pond clung to him without a word. Joong pouted. He wanted Dunk to hug him like that but he knew Pond needed Dunk at the moment. He sighed before he walked out of the room, aiming to go to the patio for a smoke. Dunk's habit was getting to him.