︶꒦꒷♡꒷꒦︶
─── ⋆⋅☆⋅⋆ ──
Another turning point, a fork stuck in the road
Time grabs you by the wrist, directs you where to go
So make the best of this test, and don't ask why
It's not a question, but a lesson learned in time-Good Riddance-Green Day-
─── ⋆⋅☆⋅⋆ ──
Hana POV:
Today marks a big step for me: I'm finally moving into my own place! Well, I've rented it, but I've managed to save enough to cover a whole year's rent, which feels like a huge accomplishment. The feeling of freedom and the thrill of a new beginning course through me.
The apartment is shared, so I'll be living with one other person. I don't know much about them yet, but that's okay—I'm good at keeping to myself. I imagine the kind of person they might be. Will they be quiet like me, or loud and social? Either way, I'm ready for this change.
I've been looking forward to this for a long time. Don't get me wrong; I love my parents. They've raised me well and instilled values that guide me. However, being an only child has meant constant supervision, even when they're busy with work. I can recall countless times when I felt their eyes on me, their expectations weighing heavy. I think back to family dinners filled with discussions about my future, about grades, and about success. It'll be nice to finally have my own space and some independence at last.
Still, I can't shake the guilt. When I failed at something I'd worked hard for, they often blamed me for not trying hard enough. It felt like I was never quite enough for them. I remember the sting of disappointment in their voices, the way it echoed in my mind long after the conversations ended. I kept pushing myself harder and harder, which is how I got to where I am now. But in the process, it took a toll on me. Moving out feels like a crucial step toward healing, but it's also terrifying.
I need to work through these feelings on my own, without burdening my parents with unnecessary worries. I sometimes imagine their reaction if they ever found out what I've been dealing with—the guilt eats at me every time. I don't want to add to their concerns. It's strange—I still feel grateful for them, despite everything. They gave me so much, but I need to carve my own path.
.・。.・゜✭・.・✫・゜・。.
I'd be a hypocrite if I said life was always terrible; there have definitely been things that kept me going, though I'm not sure they're working anymore. My two best friends, Yang Jeong-in and Kim Seung-min, have been my anchors since high school. I love them dearly, but lately, even their support doesn't seem to help as much.
Being around them used to distract me from the storm in my head, giving me a reprieve, even if just for a little while. I remember our late-night talks, laughter echoing in the dark as we shared our dreams and fears. But now, with everyone busy living their own lives, it's harder to find that escape. We still text and check in on each other, but it just doesn't have the same impact anymore.
.・。.・゜✭・.・✫・゜・。.
My parents weren't exactly upset about me moving out; in fact, they saw it as a positive step. When I told them I'd rented an apartment, my dad said, "It's great to see you taking charge of your own life. I thought you'd depend on me forever." His words felt a bit loaded, but I tried to take it positively.
Thanks, Dad, for showing how much you expect from me. I want to prove that I can handle this, that I can be independent.
My dad even called a packing service to handle everything the day before my move. I was surprised but relieved. Within a few hours, most of my things were packed and loaded onto the truck. The movers had already set everything in my new room, ready for me to settle in.
As I prepare to drive there early in the morning, my excitement builds. I can't wait to see my new space and finally unpack my things. The thought of arranging my furniture, deciding how to decorate the walls, and making it my own fills me with anticipation. Thankfully, tomorrow is Sunday, giving me plenty of time to sort everything out before the work week begins.
︶꒦꒷♡꒷꒦︶
a/n: i don't like this chapter much, but i hope it'll get better once the story actually starts
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Lovely Boxer - LeeKnow
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