out of the blue | gracie abrams

XXXVII

xxxvii - 1 step forward, 3 steps back.

26th of June, 2023, Los Angeles

-3:56pm-

"Pippa?" Gracie prompted, "Bird, could you please say something?"

Tears continued to well in her eyes as the words of her own admission hung heavy in the air between herself and Pippa. Gracie stared straight ahead at the girl in front of her, the one whose eyes were wide as she looked straight through Gracie like a ghost, pillow clutched so tightly to her chest that her knuckles were turning white. There were droplets of sweat beading on Pippa's forehead and Gracie wasn't sure it was from the Los Angeles heat. The smaller girl hadn't said anything since Gracie's confession, and the silence was beginning to drive Gracie to insanity.

Pippa looked downright catatonic.

"Birdy, please-" Gracie reached for her, only for Pippa to flinch away from her and stand from her spot on the couch.

"All of that," Pippa finally spoke, "All of that misery, that soul crushing self doubt, the constant second guessing, never feeling like I was good enough, all of those years that I had to endure, all of that was over some stupid bet you made over soccer?"

"Birdy, please, I didn't mean for any of that to happen, it was just-"

"How could you do that to me, Gracie?" Pippa accused, "How could you do that to anybody?"

"I didn't-"

"Do you have any idea, any idea, what I put myself through, just to be treated like absolute shit?! For four whole years, Gracie, four years," Pippa yelled, fingers digging into the skin of her arms through her sleeves, "And now I find out nobody ever even loved me in the first place? That none of it was real?"

"Pippa-"

"How do you manage to keep finding new and creative ways to ruin my life? And before you even knew who I was, for that matter," Pippa couldn't lie, she was almost impressed, "All of that... was for nothing?"

Gracie had never felt more guilty than she did when she heard the way those words rolled off Pippa's tongue. She sounded like a little kid, voice so tiny and weak it was barely there. The scene was reminiscent of the feeling of watching your best friend play with another group of girls on the playground without you. Gracie had tainted a kind of innocence that nobody was allowed to touch. She stood, stepping towards Pippa.

"Birdy, I'm sorry, I-"

"Don't, Gracie. Just- just don't," The look in Pippa's eyes was one Gracie hadn't ever seen before, not from Pippa, not from anyone.

It was one of complete and utter betrayal, she was staring at Gracie as if she had been the one to completely tear her heart out, rip it to shreds and stomp on it for good measure. Pippa's arms went to wrap around herself again, now too angry to cry anymore.

"Birdy, please, I'm so sorry, I-"

"Gracie, I think you should leave."

"Bird, no, please-"

"Go! Just leave, Gracie! Please," Pippa backed away further, inching towards the front door of the apartment and opening it.

The distance between them was twisting Gracie's soul into a stormy tornado, plucking it apart piece by painful piece. It felt like the rest of the room had disappeared into a chasm, the only thing remaining was two tortured hearts, one broken by the other, and the one that did the breaking - breaking itself from the impact of the explosion.