WINNER OF HEART♡

◇part 22◇

Certainly! Here’s the text for you to copy:

---

I froze in my spot, the weight of my heartache pressing down on me like a heavy blanket. Deep within, my heart screamed, “My Janan can’t bear this much pain.” Looking at the doctor, I could see the concern etched on his face. “We have to admit you because you can collapse anytime and anywhere,” he said softly.

I nodded, my voice lost in the turmoil of my thoughts. The doctor left, and I lay there, staring blankly at the ceiling. Images of Janan flooded my mind, and I couldn’t hold back the tears any longer. I screamed in agony, “Jan… my baby, what should I do now?”

My hand instinctively found its way to my heart, which felt like it was breaking into pieces. “I can’t make you suffer because of me, love. I should leave you,” I whispered to the silence around me. My heart raced, a frantic drumbeat echoing my inner chaos.

I couldn't stay in that hospital room any longer. I needed to see her one last time. I got myself discharged and drove as fast as I could to her house. Her voice rang in my ears, haunting me: “Let me die first, or I will die twice.”

I wiped my tears harshly, determination surging within me. I reached her house and stepped out of the car. As I entered, I saw her coming toward me, a radiant smile lighting up her face. I longed to embrace her, to hold her tightly for what could be the last time, but I forced myself to stop. I couldn’t bring her that pain; Allah would be angry with her.

Forcing a smile onto my face, I said, “My baby is looking happy, hmm?”

Her smile widened, but there was a hint of uncertainty in her eyes. She lowered her gaze and said, “I saw you in my dreams today.”

My heart twisted painfully at her words, and I fought to maintain my composure. “I should go now,” I managed to say, each word feeling like a dagger.

Her confusion deepened. “But you just came now.”

Sighing, I tried to mask the anguish in my voice. “It’s time to go, my Jan. Fi Amanillah.”

Her face fell, the sad pout making my heart ache even more. “Fi Amanillah,” she echoed, her voice barely a whisper. I last time glanced at her and whispered in my heart, "You should hate me than Suffer because of my death. If there is a Life after this I will ask Allah to make you mine there,
I am leaving you In his care,
Fi Amanillah my beloved Jan."

I sat in the car, my heart heavy as I drove straight to my home. Once there, I mustered the strength to explain everything to my parents. Losing their only child was an unimaginable burden, one that weighed heavily on their hearts. Yet, they wore a façade of strength, putting on brave faces for my sake, trying to hide their own devastation so that I wouldn’t break.

We were preparing to leave this country behind, shifting our lives to Turkey where our business branch awaited us. My father assured me he would take care of everything, but deep down, I knew that my Janan would never forgive me for abandoning her like this. The thought of her pain pierced through me, a constant reminder of the love I was leaving behind.

As the night deepened, I gathered all my belongings, meticulously packing away the items that held memories of her—each item a reminder of our time together. I was set to leave tomorrow, and the weight of that knowledge hung heavily in the air, a silent testament to the finality of my decision.

Later that night, I found myself sitting on the balcony, gazing up at the star-studded sky. Each twinkling star reminded me of our moments together, cherished fragments of happiness that now felt so distant. All I had left were memories, and the realization struck me like a bolt of lightning, igniting a deep ache within my chest.