Bubble

16. All I Ever Wanted

After introductions had been made, Changbin and Han moved to sit at the table in the kitchen. They both had a sheet of paper between them and were trying to think of ways to test the theory of Bang Chan's invincibility without killing him just in case they were wrong. Felix and I.N continued sitting on the couch, trying to let everything sink in.

"This is heavy," said Felix finally as he broke the awkward silence that had descended upon the apartment. "I'd ask why you didn't tell me all this before, but I understand it's probably because we barely know each other."

"I still...I need a minute," said I.N as he moved to stand up from the couch. "Is there somewhere where I can...take a moment to breathe?"

A sympathetic smile broke out onto Bonita's facea as she pointed towards her bedroom. Nodding his head quickly, I.N moved to step into the room. She could barely make out his semi-shallow breathing as he entered, completely on the verge of falling apart again. Felix was about to get off the couch to follow after him, but Bang Chan held up a hand.

"Let me talk to him," said Bang Chan to Felix. "He's like this right now because of me."

Felix nodded, sinking back down onto the couch as Bang Chan moved to enter Bonita's bedroom, shutting the door behind him to give them privacy. I.N was sitting on the edge of the bed with his back to the door, his shoulders heaving up and down as he took deep breaths to catch his breath. It still came out in stuttered gasps though as if he was on the verge of a full-on breakdown.

The first time that Bang Chan had been in his bunker shelter after fully realizing that all those he loved were dead, he had a similar breakdown. He thought for sure that the breath was being sucked from his lungs and that he would die gasping for air like some fish out of water. Walking slowly over to I.N, Bang Chan moved to sit down beside him. The other didn't turn to face him, still trying to breathe properly. Bang Chan moved to grab one of I.N's hands in his, squeezing it.

"Close your eyes and take one deep breath in then out," instructed Bang Chan as memories of doing the same once upon a time himself came to him.

I.N just nodded, squeezing Bang Chan's hand in return as he closed his eyes. He took in a deep breath before letting it out slowly, repeating the action several times before his breathing seemed to return to normal.

"S-sorry..." mumbled I.N as he still kept his eyes closed.

"It's okay," said Bang Chan. "It's a lot. I get it."

I.N just nodded his head before slowly opening his eyes. Bang Chan could see the tears dancing there. I.N seemed to be refusing to let them fall though, as if there was a dam there that he was desperately trying to keep in place to stay in one piece.

"Can you tell me about Chris?" asked Bang Chan softly. "All I know is that I'm based on him, look like him, and sound like him.

"How much are you wanting to know?"

"As much as you're willing to tell me."

Taking one more deep breath to steady his nerves, I.N began to tell his tale as he kept a hold of Bang Chan's hand.

"Before I was known as writer I.N, I was nothing more than a poor boy named Yang Jeongin..."

- - -

Six-year-old Jeongin held tightly to his mother's hand as they walked into the park. It was one of the very few days she had off and she had promised to bring him to the park to play on the equipment. Jeongin's eyes were filled with childish wonder as he drank in the sights before him. Even though the chill of winter hung in the air, there were still puffball children running about and playing. Jeongin waited until he was in the wood shavings before letting go of his mother's mittened hand to run towards the swing set, puffs of his breath coming out in the air as he ran, making him look like a fluffy little steam train. His mother chuckled, coming up behind him to help make sure he was situated safely on the swing before beginning to push him.