Cowboys & Horses

Chapter 25

My heart stopped. My body broke out into a cold sweat. Adrenaline pulsed through me. I opened my mouth to respond but nothing came out except short, shallow breaths.

"Soph?" His voice hit my eardrums once more, confirming this was all too real.

A nauseating wave hit me like a sledgehammer. I turned to Brady as tears began to fill my eyes. His handsome face creased with concern and he reached a hand across, resting it on my leg.

"You ok?"

I shook my head as my phone fell into my lap. With a shaking hand, I clasped it shut.

"Hey." A gentle touch fell on my chin. "Whatever it is, it'll be ok. I promise."

"He's here," I said, my voice trembling.

"Who?"

"Ben. He's back at the ranch. In my room."

He froze for a second, disappointment leaking through his dark eyes. Then he took his hand from my leg.

That one single move ripped me apart.

It was as if he'd sliced through any connection we'd built up. He gave a single nod before turning his attention back to his truck. Starting the ignition, he drove us back to the ranch in a tension filled silence.

The closer we got, the harder my heart hammered and the more unbearable the silence became.

"I don't want to go," I said, my tears finally falling.

The thought of facing Ben was like a dark storm cloud shadowing my mind. A wall of pressure was building inside me, threatening to burst through anything I'd managed to salvage of myself over the past two weeks.

Brady pulled over on the side of the road. A cloud of dust burst into the air at his sharp stop, settling all around us.

"What do you mean?" His soft tone gave me hope he wasn't backing away from me.

"I don't want to go back to the ranch. I don't want to see him. I'm not ready to see him." I covered my damp face with my hands. "How did he find me anyway?"

A strong arm slid around my shoulders, pulling me in close to his warm body. "Just calm down. Breathe, slowly."

I did as I was told, finding his instructions helping to lessen the rising panic inside me.

"Good," he said, running a hand through my hair. "You've got to go back to the ranch at some point. Unless you want to sleep out here."

I giggled. "No. Bit too prickly for me."

He smiled before pressing his lips to the side of my head. I closed my eyes at his kiss, revelling in the affection. He pulled away, settling back in his own seat.

"You may feel differently once you see him again."

My eyes widened as I gawped at him. "I doubt that."

A weak smile flitted across his features. "I shall give you some space. Once we're back."

I turned my head, staring out of the window as he continued to drive us on towards my impending doom. His words stung like a nest of wasps had covered me, their tiny barbs driving the reality into me stronger and harder with each hit.

As we turned into the roadway, an explosion of panic and nausea swamped me. My stomach churned, and my head began to spin. I couldn't believe this was happening.

We pulled up in front of the main house. I took my seatbelt off and jumped out of the truck without a single word. Part of me hoped Brady would follow, but he didn't. Instead, he walked straight into the barn in his own world of silence.

***

Approaching my room, I took a deep breath before opening the door. I stepped inside, apprehension coursing through me. Ben was sat on my bed, resting his back against the wall. The second his green eyes lit up with a warm smile, turmoil and confusion began muddling together deep inside.

"Hello, gorgeous." He sprang up, striding towards me with his arms outstretched.

I found myself rooted to the spot as he wrapped his arms around me. My need to be sick dispelled into nothing, familiarity and comfort easing me instead. I closed my eyes and found my arms winding their way around him too. Everything about him was just so homely and cosy. His smell, his clothes, his voice. Even his hug relaxed me. Was this my sub conscious or not? Why did all thoughts of Alyssa disappear when I was around him?

He stepped back, grasping my hand. "How are you?"

I nodded, numb as I stared into his twinkling eyes. He pulled me over to the bed, sitting me down next to him.

"Quite a nice place out here." He gazed around the room, nodding to himself. A brief silence hung between us before he changed the atmosphere. "I've missed you, Soph. I've missed you a lot."

I faked a smile, glancing down at the floor. My heart raced inside my chest. What was I supposed to say? That I missed him too? As I debated my options, my angry side reared its ugly head, spitting words out before I could even think.

"Funny. You never missed me whilst you were screwing my sister."

In a split second, his eyes hardened, and he clenched his jaw. "Don't start, Sophie."

All rationality flew out the window as my hurt and rage filled emotions bubbled to the surface. I stood up, walking back to put distance between us.

"Don't tell me what to do," I yelled. "I came out here to get away from you, all of this crap you dumped us in. Why did you come out here, Ben? I don't want you here!"

He stood up, crossing his arms over his chest. "Yes, you do, you just don't want to admit it."

"Piss off."

He chuckled, infuriating me further. "So why hug me then, hmmm?"

Hot tears sprung from nowhere, cascading down my cheeks as I fought an internal war. "I don't know. Just...go. Please. I need some space."

"No."

"Excuse me?"

"No. I'm not leaving you. I came out here for you and I'm not leaving your side. Ever. I'm never losing you again, Sophie. I can't." His voice broke, water glazed over his eyes. He took a step towards me. "I love you more than life itself, baby. I want us to work through this."

Fury and pain tumbled together in the pits of my stomach. "Really? And what if this whole situation was turned on its head, huh? What then?"

He paused. "Well." He cleared his throat and ran a hand through his dark blonde hair. "Well I would forgive you. Because I love you."

I smirked, arrogance climbing over my venom laced words. "Shall we test that theory?"

He frowned. "What do you mean?"

"I've already slept with someone else."