Lost Luna

Dacing with your ghost

Waking up this morning, the sun beams shine through my sheer curtains.  I watch as they move and sway with the fresh breeze.  I stretch my limbs groaning in the process.  I look around.  Slowly last night comes back to me.  I sit up and lean over the bed peering to see if maybe  Abel is in my bathroom, but the lights off and it's quiet.  I get up to use it myself wondering when he left?

As I walk back to bed I realize my head isn't pounding as bad today. I sit on the bed with one leg bent under me looking down at the blankets like the answer to why my body aches less as well. Maybe letting it all out last night and finally getting a good nights sleep helped. While deep in the my door opens catching my attention.

"Good morning Luna!" Leo says in a sing song voice as always. Only today it doesn't bother me quite as much. "How are you feeling today?" He walks over with a tray of toast with jelly and a glass of orange juice. He places down on the bed infront of me and takes a seat beside it.

"It's gonna sound weird. But better actually. My head and body aches aren't as bad." I stare down at the plate of toast mindlessly. The pain in my chest is still there. My eyes start to burn, but I quickly try to blink them away. It does nothing, but keep them at bay. I look towards the window at the beautiful day. "Think I'm gonna go for a walk if that's alright?" I look from the window to Leo. Leo's eyes go wide before a small smile grows on his face.

"Of course that's alright. Do you want an escort? Just incase you get lost. And nobody will bother you if they see you have an escort." I look away contemplating if I need one.  I slowly start to shake my head no.

"Just clear out the pack house and the grounds. I'm not gonna leave the property. I just need to get out of this room. I still want to be alone though."  He nods his head before standing.

"You got it Luna. If you need anything just link us and we'll find you."  He starts to walk to the door.  He gets halfway before he stops and turns back around. "Oh and just leave the tray when you're done. I'll bring it down for you incase others are still around."  I nod returning the small grin he's giving me, and turn my attention back to the window.  I hear the door shut and let out a long breath. I look down at myself and the sweats and T-shirt I've been wearing for god knows how long. I guzzle down my juice before I stand and strip down and jump in the shower.  The hot water running over my head and down my shoulders washes the grime away.  Turning to grab shampoo I see Romes. His sandalwood scent. I open the bottle and bring it to my nose. Breathing it in I close my eyes.  The emptiness in my chest still there. A sob leaves me and this time I don't fight the tears. I used his shampoo, lathering my whole body with it before sliding down the wall just sitting in the tub. Laying my head back against the wall I close my eyes. Going over in my mind how many times I've smelt this scent after either he showered alone or while we showered together. How he would lather it up in my hair gently massaging my scalp with his finger tips.   How he'd hold me so tightly like I might disappear. If only he knew I'd be the one alone.

My eyes shoot open with that thought and I start to get angry. He did fucking know. He fucking knew he was going to die and he made sure he still had his chance with me. Leaving me alone again. Just like he did when he killed my parents. 

I quickly get up and rinse everything off. Not wanting to smell it for another second. I dry myself off throwing my hair in a towel before I go to my closet. I drop the towel from my body when I walk in quickly putting on a brah and panties. I walk to the rack and grab a baby pink eyelet dress with spaghetti straps. I step into it and zip up the side.  As I take the towel from my hair and flip my head back to rid my face of wet hair I look right up at his rack of suits. Dropping the towel without much thought my finger reach for the sleeve of one of his dress shirts.   I roll the fabric between my fingers remembering the feel every time I hugged him or held him close.  I bring the sleeve to my nose breathing in his cologne still on this shirt.