Coven Of Catastrophe: Book 3 in the Lorna Maximoff Series

Should I stay or should I go

All day I mulled over how to tell America I was leaving. It wasn't going to be permanent, but I couldn't bring her with me. Even though I knew she could take care of herself I would never be able to forgive myself if she got hurt helping me. And after what my mother had done to her, I wasn't to keen to find out what Agatha might do...to us both.

And then there was Wong, who would absolutely try to stop me.
He had made his feeling about dark magic extremely clear, and while I wasn't a fan of it either, I also knew that it might be the only thing able to help me.
I had promised America that when we were both ready I would help her find her moms, and I wasn't gonna go back on that. But I needed to fix whatever was happening to me first. Because I couldn't help her if I was sleep deprived and half dead.

But try as I might I couldn't find the right time.
Anytime I attempted to talk her Wong or someone else was around, or we were training. And then there was the part of me that found it hard to tell her at all. Because the last thing I wanted to do was hurt her.
Finally when it was just the two of us alone in the library I worked up the courage to tell her.
"America...can we talk?" I asked her seriously.
She chuckled slightly, "Sure, why so serious."
I took in a deep breath mentally preparing myself.
"We'll you know how you suggested that I talk to someone about my dreams well-"
"You're gonna ask Wong?"
"Um, not exactly."
She gave me a confused look.
"Well it's just that Wong's a sorcerer, and I don't know, maybe these dreams aren't something he'd understand."
"Lorna he's the sorcerer supreme, if anyone can help you it's him."
"Actually there is someone else." I said, "someone who might be able to tell me what everything I'm dreaming means."
"Who?" She asked.
"I told you about Agatha Harkness right?"
Her features sunk with worry.
"The witch that tired to murder you, ya you've mentioned her. But please tell me your not thinking what I think your thinking!"
"Now that the darkhold is gone I think her imprisonment might be broken, or at least teetering on the edge, if I can find her then maybe she can help me understand."
"Lorna no! It's to dangerous, and Wong would never let you go."
I sighed, "That's why I can't tell him."
"And you want me to keep this secret?" She asked.
"Just until I'm in Westview, tell him I gave you no choice or something."
"Lorna you told me the last you saw Agatha she was pissed, if you find her how do you know she won't hurt you?"
"I don't." I said, "But I need this America. I have questions, about even more than my dreams. And maybe she's the only person who can help me."

America went silent and took a moment to think about it.
"Fine," she said, "But I'm coming with you."
"What?! No. No way it's to dangerous."
"Ya to dangerous for you to go alone."
"America I can't let you come with me, my mother already tried to steal your power and I'll never forgive myself for it but who do you think she learned that move from. Agatha is dangerous. If I come alone then there's a chance I can reason with her, but if you think I'm putting you in harms way again your wrong."
"Lorna we've been over this." She said sounding exasperated, "I don't blame you for Wanda's actions, and it okay now. She's gone, and she made the right choice in the end."
"But what if she isnt?" I said, "What if these dreams mean somethings coming, something bad."
America grabbed my hand, "Then we can face it together."
I shook my head and pulled away.
"No. Your my only friend, I can't risk losing you."
"It's not your decision." She said.
I looked away. We were both far to headstrong.
"I won't be gone for long. I promise. I just need to figure out what's going on with me, and then maybe learn about about what it means to be a witch."
"Why can't you learn that here?" She asked.
"Because I'm different," I said, "and because these people have suffered enough at the hands of witchcraft. So if I'm going to learn who I really am then I need to do it with someone who knows the dangers and somewhere I can't hurt anyone."
"Except yourself." America pointed out.
"I'll be careful." I promised, "And whatever I learn I'm not going to let it change me. Maybe I don't belong at Kamar Taj, but I belong with you. So you don't have to worry about me."
"So your just going to leave?"
"I need to do this. And maybe once I have we can finally find your moms."
"This isn't about them and you know it." She said.
I sighed, "Your right, it's not. But I still want to help you."

America softened.
"Alright. But you need to check in okay. Send me messages through portals."
"It's a promise."
She smiled. "So when do you have to leave."
"I was thinking as soon as possible, maybe tomorrow if I get the chance."
She nodded, "Then I'll help you distract Wong, and keep him off your back while you do what you have to."
Gratitude flooded my chest, and I had to fight the urge to cry. America really was the most wonderful person I'd ever met. And as much as it pained me to leave her I was relieved to have her support.
"Thank you." I said, "I promise I'll be back."

Later that night we planned for my trip. America helped me pack a small bag, I didn't have very much but I figured it was best to be prepared.
"I still wish you wouldn't go." She said, "I'll miss you."
"I'll miss you too." I told her, "but I have to trust my gut on this one. Please tell me you understand." She sighed, "yeah, I guess."
She turned and rummaged through one of her drawers, I wasn't sure what she was looking for until she pulled out her jacket.
"Here," she said, and took one of the pins off, "Take this, then you'll have to come back so you can return it to me."
I rubbed the pin between my index finger and my thumb, "I'll always come back." I said, and then added, "you're my best friend remember."
She smiled and that feeling I had the first time I saw her returned.
I couldn't sleep that night so we sat, at talked till the sun came up, then I made a portal. We peered into for a while before I actually got up the courage to go through.
"I'll see you soon." I said, and hugged America.
"Soon." She repeated. "And I'll make sure Wong doesn't follow you. Just...be safe okay.
"Always." I said. And then I walked through.