Dopamine | Adrenaline Book Two

20- The Greatest

"I think that for tonight I'm better off just being Charles," the brunette spoke softly, his voice barely audible and brushing his lips against Max's to reconnect them in a kiss. "I think you like me better when there's no racing involved," he added, an ache in his heart following quickly behind as he acknowledged that being each other's competition meant that Max couldn't push past his need to win in order to keep him. However, even with his brain screaming at him to be reasonable and to accept that Max had made up his mind, Charles' heart couldn't find it in itself to believe that what they feel for each other isn't stronger than a title— one of which Max already had four of.

As Charles hovered over Max, unable to break their kiss, he had a spark of hope in him. Maybe Max had asked him to stay because there was a chance that he could change his mind and believe him. All their declarations of love couldn't be thrown away over a wrongful accusation and maybe Max just needed a couple more hours to feel how much Charles loved him, maybe then he'd love him back enough to believe him.

"Can we kiss until the sun rises?" Charles asked, gazing at the blond beneath him, his blue eyes a sight Charles never wanted to part from. "You," he started, brushing his thumb over Max's bottom lip before placing a gentle kiss there, "you make me so happy, Max. I don't want this to end."

Max looked a bit saddened by the statement, his gaze avoiding Charles as if he wanted to sidestep the difficult emotions at play. "I didn't want it to end either," he confessed softly, noticing the room gradually brightening with the first rays of sunshine filtering through the curtains.

"I wish..." Max paused, taking a deep breath before meeting Charles's eyes again. His green gaze now reflected the morning light seeping into the room. "I wish you could prove to me that it wasn't you," he whispered, his brow furrowing slightly. "I wish it wasn't you."

Max sighed heavily, his lips parting as he sat up, anticipating Charles's response to his earlier plea. "You ask me to believe you without proof, but I'm not blind, and I'm not a saint. I've been used since the day I was born because my father wanted to win, and I still love him anyway," he confessed, turning to look at Charles. "And I still love you anyway." He glanced down at the edge of the bed, feeling a mix of vulnerability and embarrassment after his confession.

"But I know a winner when I see one, Charles," Max mumbled, nervously fidgeting with the edge of the bed. "My father was never one. He needed me to taste what it was like to win. But you don't... so I don't understand..." He faltered, realizing he was pulling back, adjusting his posture. "We think very differently, I suppose. You'll never understand what it feels like to be unloved the moment you start losing. So you'll never understand why I can't lose," he frowned, whispering the last words. "And you'll never understand why I don't believe you, or anybody really, but myself. You could always count on people, trust them... I didn't get that kind of privilege."

Turning to face Charles, Max locked eyes with him. "You were raised with a soft hand to your cheek, and I was with a punch against mine. That's why I've won, and you haven't. It's not just talent. It all comes down to that moment when you decide not to believe in anyone but yourself."

"I'm offering you a soft hand now," Charles quietly pleaded, his eyes watering after Max's reality was brought into light for him. The man was right, he'd been raised softly and although the blond didn't have the same luxury, it was never too late to let people in. Without Max being able to believe him, there can be no relationship and Charles couldn't phantom the idea of losing what they have, once again. His heart was in his hands and he couldn't pry it out even if he wanted to.

"I have no way to prove that I had no involvement, but I swear on anything, Max. I know trusting me is asking a lot, but I need you to," Charles pleaded earnestly. "This doesn't have to end, and if you can just believe that I wouldn't do that to you once, let alone twice, then we can figure it out together. I want to win, Max. I'm not lying about that, but I don't want to win if it means hurting you."