Echoes of Heart (Duology of He's Pregnant?!)

Chapter 13

Nagulat ako nang biglang akong yakapin ni Linux, kaka-uwi ko lang at nasa pintuan pa lang ako. I froze while he was hugging me, he's silent too. But slowly, I quickly wrap my arms around him. It's been a long time since he hugged me.

Noong nalaman ata namin anong gender ni Devyn no'n. At noong binanggit ni Devyn ang una niyang salita.

Napahinto tuloy sina Dionne, Warren at Jirou sa likuran ko dahil bigla akong niyakap ni Linux sa may pintuan. Pero hindi naman sila nagreklamo.

"Why are you hugging me right now?" I asked him but he just hugged me, it's not tight. He's probably comforting me right now because of what happened earlier.

For sure ay napanood niya lahat nang nangyari sa live.

"I'm sorry that my fans have to do that," he whispered. Guilt is surrounding him a lot. I can feel it, ganito talaga si Linux. "I know how scary it is for you, knowing how they jump on you and accuse you of things. I'm worried about what you are thinking right now, I don't want you to think that naiiba ka sa akin at mas mahal ako ng tao."

They do love you, much more of how they love me.

But I keep quiet in my own thoughts. I do not want him to think of how messy my mind is. And how the world is telling me of how they despise me of who I am.

If siguro ay bibigyan ako ng chance na mabuhay ulit, hihilingin ko na sana hindi kami mag kambal ni Linux at mag kapatid na lang.

Dahil mas pipiliin ko na lang manalagi sa tabi niya at suportahan siya ng naiiba ang mukha ko mula sa kaniya.

"I'm alright," I said. For the first time, I lied. But I lied to my own feelings. It's heavy, actually. It's painful for me to endure those, to experience those all the time.

I never want to experience those because it's so scary.

Gusto ko na lang magtago sa mundo, I do not want anyone knowing me as Linux twin. I'm proud of who he became, his achievements and everything. I didn't despise him at all, I despise of who I am in this life.

I want a simple life, I want a life where I just bake, I do coffee and cook a lot. I never want the spotlight, but knowing that my Twin brother will be alone in the spotlight, made me feel guilty. I don't want him to feel alone, or maybe he really didn't feel that way. I just love my twin brother so much.

"I'm sorry, Lux. I don't want anyone harming you like that," he said but I just chuckled. Silly, it already happened a lot to me.

"I'm okay, they didn't harm me," sagot ko para hindi na siya mag-alala sa akin. Umalis na siya sa yakap ko at tiningnan lang ako sa mga mata, ngumiti na lang ako sa kaniya. "It's alright, magluluto na muna ako ng dinner natin. For sure gutom na kayo."

Ngumiti siya sa akin, kaya tumango ako at tinapik ang balikat niya bago dumiretso sa kusina. Hindi na ako nagbibis, mamaya na lang pag nag-shower ako. Hindi ko na rin tinawag si Devyn dahil nandiyan naman sina Warren at Dionne.

Nagsuot na kaagad ako ng apron. Napagod ako emotionally, lahat nang 'yon at nakakapagod. Ayoko na nang gano'n, siguro ay magma-mask na lang ako the whole day at pupunta sa kusina para doon mag-lunch at uminom ng kape.

"May ganiyan ka pa lang side?" Narinig kong wika ni Jirou. "Akala ko puro ka ka-demonyohan."

"Kakadating mo lang sa property ko ay ganiyan na ang ugali mo, bantot naman. Mas mabaho pa ata sa tae ko 'yan." Narinig ko naman singhal ni Linux kaya bumuntong hininga na lang ako.

Magluluto na lang siguro ako ng carbonara, para wala ng rice. Tapos meat balls na may gulay para kay Devyn. I sighed and started cooking so that we can have dinner and can rest na. Looks like Jirou and Dionne will stay here tonight.

Lumipas ang oras ay natapos na ako magluto, naghain na rin ako at tinawag sila. Naririnig ko pa rin ang ingay nilang lahat.

Hindi na sila natapos mag-away, pero may sariling mundo naman sina Warren at Dionne. Noong tinawag ko ay nagmamadali na silang naupo, gutom na ata talaga silang lahat.

Umupo na rin ako sa tabi ni Jirou, at kumain na rin kahit papaano. Nanatili akong tahimik kahit nag-aaway at nagsasalita na sila.

"Uncle-papa Luxian, are you okay?" tanong ni Devyn kaya ngumiti ako sa kaniya. May sauce pa ng carbonara ang bibig niya na mabilis naman inasikaso ni Warren.

Napatingin tuloy sina Jirou, Linux at Dionne sa akin kaya bumuntong hininga na lang ako, nakakadalawang plato na ng carbonara si Jirou at tuwang tuwa pa ata sa meatballs. Good thing at may gulay 'yon.

"Yes, baby. I'm perfectly fine, just tired po," sagot ko kaya tumango tango ito at sinabing bibigyan na lang ako ng hug para hindi na raw ako tired.

Napatingin ako kay Jirou na kumakain, may mga pagkakataon na messy siya pero mabilis niya ring pinupunasan 'yon at bumabalik sa pagkain nito.

I just stared at her, hindi na rin ako gutom kaya kaunti lang ang kinain ko. Hinayaan ko nang sila ang makaubos nito.

"Lux, alam mo bang trending ka sa lahat ngayon? Tinawagan din ako ng Manager natin to ask kung okay ka lang, maraming nagagalit doon sa nang away sa'yo kanina, deserve niya," wika nito pero bumuntong hininga ako.

"She just didn't know about it. I hope na iwanan na siya. Nagkakamali rin sila, baka talagang wala lang siya sa mood," wika ko dahil ayoko rin naman na ma-bash 'yung babae. Kasi for sure ay guilty na rin 'yon sa ginawa niya.

"But it won't justify her actions, they made a mistake but they didn't apologize to you earlier. It's not fair that they made you feel that way without apology. I hope she learns her manners," Jirou suddenly said kaya natahimik silang lahat. She does have a point about it.

Natawa tuloy si Dionne. "Baka Jirou namin 'yan! Aho!"

It's right. No matter what her circumstances are, it doesn't justify na manigaw at mangbintang siya sa isang tao pero hindi niya rin deserve ang mga salitang masasama na galing sa ibang tao dahil sa ginawa niya.

Even though she didn't say sorry, I will forgive her but it won't make me forget about the things she did to me.