Complicated

Chapter 8

October 12th 2023
Paris FR
Beyonce

Did I really just say I love you? For the whole day, that's all I've been thinking about, I really told Megan I loved her last night. 

It's not like I didn't mean it, because I've loved her for almost 3 years now, but it just slipped out naturally, and I'm scared because I don't think she feels the same way, and I don't wanna ruin what we have. 

Today we went on a private ferry ride, and it was amazing. The kids loved it, and I know Megan loved it as well from the big smile she had on her face the whole time. There was just such a light in her eyes today, and though I don't know why, I hope it stays there because it is so beautiful. 

When we got back, we ordered food and got comfy watching anime. The kids and Megan love it, me on the other hand, I just watch so I can understand the anime references they make, especially Sir. 

After putting the kids to bed, we got ready for bed ourselves. We showered together and I made it to bed first since Megan loves to take her time in the bathroom, I'm currently waiting for her to come get in bed with me. 

I'm starting to think that Megan didn't hear me last night because she hasn't brought it up-."Bey I think we should talk about last night" I spoke too soon. Megan walks out of the bathroom looking so beautiful with her hair in a messy bun and bare faced. She gets in bed and looks at me seriously. 

"What about last night?" I straddle her lap and try to play dumb, but I don't think it's working because Meg gave me the "don't play dumb" look. 

"Bey you know" she said, and I just played dumb again. "Oh, Sir and his bad dream, they don't happen often, you handled it really well" she looked at me with the. "Girl Be forreal look" taking a deep breath from her nose. 

"Bey" I just sigh in defeat, there's no point in denying it now, she knows me too well, so I just decided to let it all out. 

"I'm sorry, it just slipped out, an- and I know you don't feel the same way, I know I fucked u-" she cuts me off. 

"Bey, I love you too" I look at her in total shock. 

"You do" I question not really believing her. 

"Yes, I have for like 3 years now, I just didn't think there was any point in telling you being that you're... you're married" her eyes start to go dull as she spoke, and by the end all I could see was hurt in her eyes. 

I never knew it hurt her so much to watch me be with someone else. She always played it so cool and nonchalant, like I never saw a lick of jealousy in her eyes anytime I was with Jay. I feel horrible because I know the feeling all too well of having to watch the person, you're in love with be in love with someone else. 

Every day I saw her with that dude made me want to throw up, and I cried almost every night we were apart because of it. I was heartbroken and knowing that I've been making her feel the same pain that I don't wish on anybody, makes me feel like the shittiest person. 

I was on her case all the time, not hiding the fact that I was jealous, and she would just be so calm about it, I would have never thought she loved me because she never complained the way I did when she was with her ex. I guess she was better at hiding it then I was. 

"I- wow, I'm s-" she cuts me off. I can see the hurt in her eyes, and I could tell she was fighting back her tears. I feel like shit. 

"You know what, let's talk about somet-" I cut her off by smashing my lips on hers. 

"Bey I-" I put my index finger over her mouth. "Shhh just be in the moment, let me make it up to you" she looks at me confused, but I continued. 

"You don't know how long I've been wanting to hear you say that, but it made me realize how much you must be hurting. Let me make it up to you, let me love you. I've never loved anyone the way I love you, and I know you probably won't believe me but it's true, I don't love him but he's all I know, and we have kids. Just give me some time to figure things out, I promise you won't regret it" she just stares at me, I search her eyes for any signs of hope as a tear falls down her face. 

"Baby I'm so sorry" I add. I put both my hands on each side of her face pulling her in for another kiss. It felt electric like nothing I've ever felt before, it was so intimate but not in any way sexual. 

We slowly pull our lips apart and just stare into each other's eyes. I whip away the tears that escaped her eyes, as she wiped the tears that I didn't realize trickled down my face. 

"I love you" is all I say as I rest my hand on her cheek, and she sinks into it. "I love you too"

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Growth guys growth. Seems like they have improved in the communication department. Did y'all expect Bey to fess up. Do y'all think Bey was being truthful or was just saying what Megan wanted to hear. Where do y'all think they go from here. Anyways hope y'all enjoyed and let me know how y'all feel.

Thoughts?

Megan

Beyonce