Dead Poets and Dying Roses

Sixteenth Chapter

(AN: own plot idea)

Since yesterday's breakdown and laying in Charlie's arms I've been feeling as light as a feather. All the weight on my chest is gone and I am cleaned. Renewed. With a wide grin I take another bite of my banana and honey pancakes. Even my uncle seems to enjoy his sweet breakfast, reading his papers, while stirring the spoon in his coffee. Everything is peaceful for once. Almost like a real home. A loud ring startles us all, making my aunt smash down her cup of tea a little too hard, spilling some of its content. In a hurry she looks around, unsure if she should at first wipe up the mess or get the door. "Don't bother.", I offer my help. "I'm going." And I truly mean it, not like the time I have just wanted to hide the letter. As I open a boy with freckles not much older than me stands outside. He is tall, almost as tall as the door frame. But that's not the only thing that catches my eye. The most important attribute about his appearance is the blazer of the Welton Academy. He can't face me as I stare at him with surprise. "Well, good morning.", I greet him curiously. "Good mo- morning.", the boy stumbles over his words. "I'm here to deliver a letter to Mr. Perry." I'm already reaching out to grab it as he pulls his hand back. "In person. I have to give it to him in person.", he quickly adds, his face turning red from embarrassment. A bad feeling makes my stomach hurt and suddenly I'm not hungry anymore. "Of course." I step aside and let the messenger step in. "Follow me. It's this way." "Oh, before I forget it." The boy takes out another letter, more crumbled than the other. "Charlie Dalton paid me to give you this." With big eyes I snatch the paper and stuff it under my clothes, so Mr. Perry can't see it, giving the poor guy almost a heart attack with this action. God, Welton definitely needs girls. His helplessness of how to behave around me makes me smile for a second. But then I remeber that him being here is a bad omen. "Who is it?", my uncle questions already standing up from his seat. "Good morning, sir." The tall boy gulps. "Sorry to interrupt you. This is an urgent notification from Mr. Nolan himself." With a shaking hand he gives him the letter. Mr. Perry's brows furrow in confusion. "Thank you, boy. Rosalie, would you guide him to the door." I take another glance at the letter and than lead the boy outside again. Before leaving he nods at me with a crooked smile and I just wave at him awkwardly. As I return to the kitchen I can already hear him scream. I enter the room and see my aunt with a worried look on her face while my uncle lashes out. "I cannot believe it! How can he even dare to do something like that? And for what?" He beats his fist onto the table and I flinch. "Honey, you need to calm down." Mrs. Perry wants to reach out to her husband, but he slaps her arm away. "No, he deceived me! Deliberatley! All for this acting nonsense!" He smashes one of the cups on the floor with one angry wipe with his arm. It shatters into pieces and my aunt puts her hands over her mouth, while I just stand there, looking down. My lips are pressed together and I try to stay calm, but my heartbeat is racing. Then he marches out of the room. "Where are you going?", my aunt screams after him. "I won't let him ruin what we have already accomplished! That's all this Mr. Keating's fault!" He swaps his coat on and grabs his keys. "But I won't let him destroy my son's future!" And with that Mr. Perry slams the door shut. We can here the engines of the car rattle as he drives away. Oh, Neil. I know it's too late to warn him. What would it even change? Still, I stare at the phone in the hall, contemplating if I should call him. Silent sobs rip me back to reality. With tears on her cheeks my aunt gets on her knees, cleaning the mess, that my uncle has created. Without words I croach down beside her, collecting the pieces of the cup. After we have mopped the floor with a kitchen towel, I grab Mrs. Perry's hands. Her tears have dried, but her eyes still speak of sorrow. And even if we haven't had the closest relationship, I feel empathy towards her. "Everything will be alright, auntie." I squeeze her hands. "Don't worry, I will take care of the household for a few hours. You should calm down a bit." She musters a weak smile. "Thank you, my dear." Shaking, she stands up and caressess my face, before she goes upstairs. In silence I stare at the table.

"He won't ever let me do it! There is no escape of this! No future!" Neil's face is full of pain and agony. We sit at a bench near the lake at Welton. It's so far away from the buildings, no teacher or pupil could possibly spot us. The orange veil of the sun covers us almost like in a distant world of dreams and fantasy. "I know it looks bad, but you just have like two years to go and than you are free!", I shrug my shoulders trying to find something to cheer him up. Mr. Perry has already departed for his meeting in Chicago and I'm grateful I could have come to have his back. "Do you really believe that? He would rather lock me up in my room forever than ever letting me set foot on a stage!" Neil waves his arms around frantically, while arguing. "I won't ever be able to do what I want." His voice lacking all the joy. "Shut up." He rises his head in confusion. "What?", he says with furrowed brows, but I just stare it him blankly. "I said: Shut up!" I'm taking my cousins hands confidently. "I won't keep listening to you behaving like a crybaby! Because I thoroughly believe that you will fill whole theatres one day!" Fiercly I hold the eye contact. "And we will travel the world and you will perform every play that has ever been written down!" Neil still isn't convinced and looks at me with his sad doe eyes. "You think?" "Yes! Of course!" My voice gets high from the exitement. "You, Neil Perry, are going to be the greatest actor ever known to mankind! And you know why?" I don't even let him answer. "Because you have my support. And I will do everything, whatever it takes, to let your dream come true!" The fighting spirit inside my chest heats up more and more. "But you cannot give up! That's not what we do. There is always a way out, if not through the door, than through the window, or whatever!" Neil's laughter burst out of him without a stop. "Well, you've gotta be an expert concerning climbing out of windows." My fist hits his shoulder, but I, too, have to laugh. Then he pulls me into a hug. He is still chuckling, but wraps his arms around me as if I'm an anchor, keeping him from floating away. "Thanks.", he mumbles into my hair. I hold him thight, giving him the comfort he needs. "Always, everything will turn out just fine." We stay in this position for a while, just resting against eachother, healing. After a few minutes that have felt like a lifetime we release eachother. "I should still go talk to Mr. Keating. Maybe he knows how to make all this a little bit easier.", Neil suggests and I nod. "Sounds like a good idea. Good luck!" Like he has been stung by a bee, Neil jumps up full of motivation again. His eyes filled with his old glimmer. "I'm going to play Puck no matter what!" He dramatically raises a hand up to the sky. "YAWP!", he cries out in the chilly air. I giggle. "What the hell is it with you boys and that 'yawp'?" I still haven't got a clue of its meaning. "It's a babaric yell!" Neil is circeling me now and I just twirl around laughing to keep up with him. "Walt Whitmans ghost is haunting us all!" I catch him and we spin around together. "Yawp with me!", my cousin screams and so I do it. I cry it out at the top of my lungs with him and it has indeed a liberating and euphoric effect. Then he finally runs off to see Mr. Keating. I wave after him smiling widely. "See you tomorrow!" Neil's voice echoes through the silence of the ending day one last time. "Of course!", I call back. And tomorrow it will be.

I still sit alone at the bench for quite a time, watching the sun fade away in the distance. It's a magnificent view. Just the horizon and me. It is in this intimate moment that I have finally come to a decision. And it is, that I won't give up. I won't give up on love. I have told Neil not to throw away his dreams just like that and so I can't do it either. I have thought a lot about Charlie's invitation.

Dearest Rosalie,

Even though you are the only star that I truly admire, I would like to show you the night sky tonight to see the meteor shower together as you were stripped from such a beautiful sight for far too long.

With love,
Your Charlie

Your Charlie. It has been the moment I have read those words, that I have known that I would go. And that I want him to be exactly that. Mine.

Later Charlie is laying awake in his bed, finding no rest. Of course, it has been a risk to openly ask her out and there hasn't been certainity if she would actually come. Still, he has wished for it. Hoped for it for hours. It is already nine o'clock. He has been staring at the ceiling since they have went to bed. But instead of hearing Rose's laugh he has to listen to Cameron's snors. It is hell. Then suddenly something knocks against the window. Charlie instantly turns his head towards it. A little stone hits the glass and he smiles.