My Story Has Just Begun

My Chance To Vent

June 27th  10:43pm

-rose-

Thanks, and sorry for the late reply I was a little busy.

-winston-

Hey no need to apologize it's okay alright.

You holdin up okay?

-rose-

Yeah just mentally feel like screaming my lungs out rn I'm s tired and my heads goin in so many directs thoughts wise and I have so much going on now that my parents are home more.

-winston-

Oh boy.

How come?

What's on your mind? Would you want to vent?

You'd know you can talk to me alright.

-rose-

Well I have to make sure my siblings do there chores and they won't so I end up cleaning the whole house myself then if they do nothing I get yelled at now my moms mad cuz the girls aren't doing anything and the house is still so dirty and my dad's mad at me cuz he didn't even want me to come home and I still don't have a job and he's mad as well about the house calling me lazy asking me if I don't have a job why should he let me stay here anymore even though I've been buying my own food and stuff.

I'm just so tired and ready to give up on life but I know I can't it's just I'm so overwhelmed I have to just take it cuz if I argue or talk back in anyway I'm getting my ass kicked out and I can't even express myself cuz if I say I'm tired I'm told I'm just laying around all day and I'm so lazy when I'm not I'm sensitive to heat but I still work around the house in the 80 or more degree heat get the kitchen and living room cleaned I even clean my sisters rooms and do the dishes and help with the laundry so at this point I'd rather have a job cuz my dad will stop yelling and threatening to kick me out and my mom will stop nagging calling me lazy and getting onto me and I won't have to deal with my little sister's who can seem to clean Sidney house but not our own house and who disrespect me so much I wish I could do something But shoving my feelings into a box and burying it seems like the better option for me especially while living with a family would seems to want nothing to do with me unless I'm making money and giving it to them for whatever I'm never good enough or useful unless I'm making them money and I'm just so tired physically and mentally.

-winston-

Jesus I'm so sorry rose truly.

But listen to me no matter what happens from now on I'm gonna be here okay.

Yes I will be here to help you through it all okay.

-rose-

Sorry I wrote to much.

-winston-

I'm gonna be by yourself side no matter what happens okay.

-rose-

I feel like it'd be easier if you were here but relying on others is so hard I wanna listen to my entirety and do it myself but I don't think I'll make it out if I did it by myself but it's hard to rely on you more than anything because your just so kind I don't wanna become a problem or make your life hard with the problems I myself already have.