The Great War

IV

I was having quite the downhill day. Elias wasn't in the picture anymore; he and I had a pretty bad argument and one thing led to another. So, I've been alone for the first time in years, and I think it's just taking a toll on me.

It was a short day at school, so I didn't bother dressing up. I just went in a hoodie and joggers. I've been home for like 2 hours and haven't left my bed. I curl into myself, Lilium sitting next to me. I cover my eyes as I cried. I felt pathetic.

Lilium hugged me to her front, shushing me and rocking us back and forth. I don't really know why I felt so down all of the sudden. I just did. "It's okay, Daph. You'll get out of this slump soon."

I shake my head, weakly. "I know..." I mumble, she hugs me tighter and rocks me, like an actual baby. That's what I felt like. A pathetic baby crying over nothing at all. "God, I'm overreacting over fucking being alone."

I sat up more and she grabbed my face forcing me to look at her, "You aren't,"

I broke down again. I felt hopeless. I felt sick. I wanted to vomit. "I'm sorry... I'm sorry." I repeatedly said. She looks at me confused and hugs  me again.

"Don't be sorry, you have nothing to be sorry for." I really wasn't processing what she was saying and kept repeating it until all that moved was my lips, nothing vocally coming out.

𖤐

I lay sprawled out on my bed exhausted, my eyes motionlessly staring at my ceiling.

"You want me to call Theo?" I slowly moved my dry eyes to Lilium who sat on a loveseat in the corner of my room.

"Sure." I mutter, she nods and pulls her phone out. I tune out of the call and looked at my ceiling fan move.

"He'll be here soon, okay?"

I nodded and closed my eyes, keeping quiet. I could feel how worried Lilium was for me. It was kind of refreshing. Seeing someone so worried for me. It came crashing down again. But I didn't cry.

𖤐

I opened my eyes when my bedroom door slammed against the wall, "I come with food," Theo walked in smiling, a food bag in one hand and a bag of assorted candies in the other. I sit up and smile, for the first time in hours.

"Hey, Tee-Tee." I mutter his nickname affectionately; I was never going to miss an opportunity to be an idiot with Theo. He looked at me with a lopsided smile and he gave me the candies and Lilium the food bag as he sat down behind me pulling me to get situated between his legs.

I felt a deep comfort having both of them here. I gave Theo the closed candy bag and had him open it as Lilium left the room to get utensils and plates. After the bag was opened, he dumped some out in my lap.

I smiled and kissed his cheek affectionately in thanks. I didn't feel like speaking. I'd always acted out of character when I was in a depressive state. Not my normal bullshit. I always got cranky and weird.

𖤐

I take a deep breath as I sit next to my fellow students. The gown and graduation cap on and everything. I felt both scared and ecstatic. I knew I wasn't gonna go to college for at least a year or so.

I wanted to see life first-hand before I throw myself into studies again. See what life has to offer. I didn't know what I wanted to be yet, so I wanted to take that year to see.

I stand up when my name was called. Taking a deep breath before stepping forward with a smile.

Months Later, Halloween/Fall Festival—