ʜᴇʀᴏ

window flower

they say the way to really get to know someone is by observing them in times of crisis.

fizz had been asleep in that icu bed for a week. and everyone in the gang was coping in their own way.

darry threw himself into his work. working longer hours, taking odd jobs here and there. he said it's because of the hospital bills but i think it distracted him, took his mind off of things.

soda spent every second he could at the hospital. he had only been home twice that week to shower and change clothes. but he stayed in the waiting room for the most part. it was hard for him to see fizz like that. i think he just wanted to be there in case something happened.

ponyboy went on as normal for the most part, still partially in a state of shock i think. he was still going to school and doing his homework. but every night he'd go to the hospital to sit by her bed and read to her.

we barely saw steve. he spent his hours at the garage, working on cars and getting his hands dirty. the only times he wasn't at the garage was when he would bring dinner to soda at the hospital. he'd peak his head into fizz's room to check on her but he'd never stay long.

two-bit must've gained ten pounds that week. every time i saw him, he was eating. he wasn't cracking jokes, he wasn't making sly comments. he stayed quiet for the most part. quietest i'd ever heard the guy. it was weird.

and cherry came to the hospital every day after school. she'd stay for hours. she'd hold fizz's hand, talk to her about what was going on at school, and then kneel down by her bed side to pray for her.

i hadn't gone back to my house since we arrived the first night. home was wherever fizz was. and she needed me.

so i sat by her bedside day and night. the days started to blend together as the rotating cycle of nurses and doctors came in to check on fizz and examine her.

dr. shepherd had been by every hour to do neuro checks. i didn't understand why, a nurse could've done it.

i sat by her bed, just watching her. the rhythmic beeps from the monitor was the only sound filling the creepily silent room.

the clock struck 4 p.m. and dr. shepherd made his way into the room like he did every hour on the hour.

he looked at me and smiled softly.
"how are you doing?"

"well, she hasn't moved or anything. but i can see her eyes moving under her eyelids, that's a good sign, right?"
i asked, looking up at him.

"i asked how you're doing.."
he said, walking over to the other side of fizzle's bed and looking down at me.

i looked at him for a moment and shrugged.
"i'm fine."

"you should go home. take a shower, eat something. she wouldn't want you to put your life on pause.."
he said, taking out his flashlight.

"you don't know what she'd want."
i snapped back.

he looked at me and sighed.
"you're right, i don't.."

he turned the flashlight on and lifted her eyelid, shining the bright light in it.

"don't you ever go home?"
i asked him.

"i'm a surgeon. we practically live at the hospital.."
he said, looking into her other eye.

i watched him for a moment
"don't you have other patients?"

"i do.."
he nodded.

"then why do these checks every hour when a nurse or a resident could do it?"
i asked.