UNSEEN PAIN. minsung

⚠️ 𝟐𝟎. // goodnight, my pretty boy

Jisung couldn't do this anymore.

More and more floods of tears gushed from Jisung's eyes as he reached for the object and took it in his trembling clutch. His entire body shook with the weight of his despair as he fumbled for a piece of paper and a pen, his movements weak and unsteady. He then weakly climbed into the bathtub, the cold porcelain a stark contrast to the burning pain inside him.

His throat was dry,

his voice a mere whisper of what it used to be.

His eyes were exhausted, red and swollen from endless crying, a reflection of the torment within.

His heart was aching, a deep, relentless throb that seemed to echo through his entire being.

All of that pain, all of that suffering, would come to an end in a heartbeat.

Han Jisung knew from the start of his journey battling the horrendous thoughts that no matter what, he'd never get better.

The darkness had wrapped itself around him, suffocating any glimmer of hope. He always knew he would remain the way he was, trapped in a cycle of anguish and despair.

This was his best choice,

and his only choice.

This was what should have happened ages ago.

This would be his ending.

Han Jisung had unalived himself that night.

He spent the last moments of his life alone, with tears pouring down his puffy cheeks and the image of his lover imprinted in his mind.

Minho would be his last thought, the one ray of light in his darkened soul.

The house was empty, the silence deafening. His mother had left for work, unaware that she would return to find her son lifeless in the bathroom, a heartbreaking scene that would haunt her forever.

In the end, Jisung got what he wanted.

He wanted the pain to go away, and now, he was painless.

His suffering had ceased, his anguish silenced.

But the emptiness he left behind would echo through the lives of those who loved him, a stark reminder of the battle he fought and the pain he endured. The tears he shed would be replaced by those of his loved ones, their hearts breaking as they grappled with the loss.

Minho, his beloved, would be shattered, his own heart breaking as he realized the extent of Jisung's suffering. The weight of guilt and sorrow would press down on him, an unbearable burden he would carry forever.

Jisung's final act was one of desperation, a heartbreaking end to a life filled with pain.

And so, Jisung's story ended in a cold bathtub, his final moments marked by tears and sorrow. The pain he carried was gone, but the love he left behind would remain, a bittersweet memory of a soul too fragile for this world.

———

Minho, my one and only.

I am so deeply sorry for what I did. The pain I've been carrying has grown too heavy to bear, so overwhelming that I felt like it was suffocating me. It consumed me, leaving me no escape. Minho, I couldn't see another way out. If I hadn't ended things, I feared the pain would ultimately destroy me.

I love you more than words can express, and I always will. Even though I'm no longer with you, I will be watching over you, hoping for your happiness and success from the heavens above. Please, go on and live a beautiful life, even if it's without me.

I know you're struggling too, Minho. Please, stay strong for me. Though I am gone, my spirit will always be by your side, supporting you in every step you take. Always.

I never found the courage to tell you this, but I've been battling with self-harm for some time now. You were my only solace, the one person who could make me forget my pain, even if just for a little while.

Every time I felt the urge to harm myself, I would think of you and how heartbroken you'd be if you found out. I feared you'd see me as a failure. But this time, the pain became too much. I'm so sorry, Minho. I couldn't hold on any longer. I failed you, and for that, I am eternally sorry.

I hope you can forgive me someday. Please remember the good times we shared, the love and laughter that brightened even my darkest days. Your smile was a light in my life, a beacon of hope that kept me going for as long as I could. Your kindness and love were the most beautiful gifts I ever received, and I cherished every moment we had together.

Please don't let my absence overshadow your life. You have so much to offer, so much love to give, and I believe in you. Find happiness, find joy, and live a life full of the dreams we once talked about. Know that I'll be watching, cheering you on, and wishing for your every success.

Take care of yourself, Minho. Surround yourself with people who love you, who can help you through the tough times. Don't be afraid to reach out for help when you need it. You deserve all the happiness in the world, and I want you to find it.

I will miss you more than I can ever say. But even in death, my love for you remains. It is unending, unwavering, and forever a part of who I am. Goodbye, my love. Until we meet again.

enjoy your life, Minho

— Yours forever, Han Jisung.

Loud tears strolled down Minho's now red cheeks as he folded the paper up and put it back in the envelope, placing it gently on his bedside table. His heart felt like it was being ripped apart, the pain seeping into every part of his being.

His bottom lip quivered uncontrollably as his grip on the small, smooth rock he had made as a keepsake tightened. It had been a gift, something simple yet filled with so much love and meaning. Now it felt like the only tangible connection he had left, a symbol of the love that was now gone forever. His heart ached with an intensity that was almost unbearable, a physical manifestation of his profound grief.

"Now, you're one of the stars I wanted to show you..." Minho whispered, his voice breaking as he looked up at the ceiling, his vision blurred by the relentless stream of tears. He tried to wipe them away, but they just kept coming, each tear a testament to the depth of his sorrow and the love he had lost.

"I hope you can sleep peacefully now, my dear," Minho sobbed, his throat tight with emotion. Each word was a struggle, each breath a painful reminder of the emptiness that had taken residence in his heart.

"Goodnight forever, my pretty boy," he choked out, his voice barely more than a whisper. The room around him felt colder, emptier, as if the very air had been stripped of warmth and comfort. He curled up on his bed, clutching the rock to his chest, as if holding on to it could somehow bring back the warmth and love he so desperately missed.

The memories of their time together played in his mind like a haunting, bittersweet melody. The laughter they shared, the dreams they talked about, the silent moments of understanding and love—all now fragments of a past that seemed so distant yet so painfully close. He remembered the way his lover's eyes lit up when they talked about their future, the gentle touch of their hands, the warmth of their embrace. Each memory was a precious, agonizing reminder of what he had lost.

As the night wore on, Minho found himself talking to the stars, as if hoping his words could reach the one he had lost. He spoke of his day, his fears, his hopes for the future, and his undying love. The stars, silent and distant, seemed to listen, their soft glow a faint echo of the love that had once brightened his life.

Minho's tears eventually slowed, but the pain in his heart remained. He knew it would never truly go away, that it would be a part of him forever. But he also knew that his lover would want him to find happiness, to live a life full of the dreams they had shared. And so, with a heavy heart, he vowed to try, to keep going, one day at a time, with the memory of his pretty boy guiding him from the stars above.

Did y'all like this story?😭 first story so a bit all over the place but wtv