PAPER HEARTS - Ryeji (English ver)

Chapter 1

She wanted to keep sleeping, of course she did. When you're asleep, you don't feel, you don't remember. However, it was time to wake up if she didn't want to be late for the job that helped her survive while she figured out how to fulfill her dream—a dream that, paradoxically, she wasn't going to achieve by sleeping.

She pulled off the soft sheet and stretched a bit as she sat up in bed to ask herself, as she did every day, if it was really worth going to her job.

—If I don't go, they might fire me— she told herself, weighing the pros and cons of the situation. —And if they fire me, I won't have money. Without money, I can't eat, and then I'll die.— And though the thought of food didn't bother her, she made a face, thinking it wasn't a bad option. —But if I die, no one will publish my unfinished books— she whispered before sighing and finally getting out of bed—excuses.

The wooden floor was cold, her feet noticed that; yet she dragged them across to the bathroom connected to her bedroom and looked at herself in the mirror.

—Wow, your dark circles are bigger today— she said to her reflection, as if it were someone else. —And your hair is a mess— she laughed like a madwoman, though she had a long way to go to become one. —I guess it's nothing a shower and some makeup—though I don't plan on putting any on—can't fix.— With that said, she moved her tired body to the shower and simply let the water run over her hair and body, hoping that this time she might drown in the process.

She had little desire to go to work that day; she never wanted to go, not even before the divorce. She knew she no longer needed to wear her wedding ring, but it was so pretty and expensive that she always wore it. Besides, it was her secret weapon against the underpaid, lecherous coworkers at her job. One would think she would nostalgically remember her married life, but on the contrary, it reminded her why she wouldn't marry again.

After leaving the shower, drying off, and putting on some elegant attire that set her apart at work, she finally left her room to go downstairs and have breakfast, if you could call it that.

—Alright...— she began, heading to the refrigerator and noticing it was almost empty. —Milk— she said, taking the jar with both hands and then closing the refrigerator door with one of her feet. She placed the milk jar on the kitchen counter, took the cereal box from one of the high cabinets, would combine them, and heat up some leftover black coffee from the previous day. That would be her delicious breakfast. —Genius— she praised herself as she finished setting it on the table.

Ryujin loved her cereal; it was her start to the day. She couldn't do anything without her cereal or daily coffee, and that made it clear she wasn't eating well at all.

She read the news on her phone and frowned as she saw how one was worse than the other.

—In my books, these things don't happen— she said after swallowing the last bite of cereal. —In my books, everything is less realistic and more perfect.— She sighed, realizing that no one knew that for now. Her books were her treasure. —In my books, everything is happy— she whispered.

She left the dishes in the dishwasher and, after brushing her teeth, it was time to go to work. She had to be at least a little happy since it was payday. At least she had a good job; she would never deny that. However, it wasn't what she wanted for her life, not what she had ever dreamed of, but at least no one knew that there.

—Ms. Ryujin— greeted the parking attendant. Ryujin just avoided rolling her eyes. —How are you?—

—Miss— she corrected before anything else. —You know I've been divorced for a while.—