Responsibilities That Ties Us

Chapter 32: Eight Dozen Mother

The car ride was tame than I anticipated, dahil nga si Landon yung kamasa ko. I was entirely expecting him to have an endless rant or talk at walang awang aasarin ako buong oras; his silence alone was out of character enough that I had started talking for my sanity.

Halfway down the destinasyon, he did started talking like he usually do, pero parang iniiwasan yung elepanteng kasama namin sa sasakyan. He focused on the road, pero kita ko ring ang kuryosong niya mga mata saakin minsan.

I leaned into the car door, enjoying watching the outside surroundings pass in a blur.

"Kung may tatanungin ka, just say it..." I mumbled.

Landon cleared his throat at nahihiyang tumawa. "I... Akala ko hindi mo gustong pagusapan."

I hummed, throwing my head against the car headrest while keeping my eyes on the passing scenery; lumulubog na rin ang araw. "You're too silent."

"Luh," ngisi niya, "akala ko ba ayaw mo sa bunganga ko."

One look from me was enough to stop whatever stupidity was brewing in his mind, which is, as I said again, uncharacteristic of Landon. Gusto ko nga tanungin, but I have my own matters to think about.

"Just not used to your silence, is all. You can keep it up though."

"Luh, ito naman oh..."

And that threw him into a random rant about anything he could think of, filling the remaining car ride with his annoying voice. Pero, as much as gusto ko siyang pigilan, hindi rin ako makampante sa katahimikan ng utak ko. For some reason, I had expected to feel a sense of dread or any negative feelings like the ones I've been feeling the past month. Embes na 'yun, I was sitting there feeling a little too calm for my good.

I... honestly don't know the right thing to feel. I'm sitting here, calm as I could ever be while driving down a road that I once passed by, the time when he and I... went to that guy's house. I didn't even noticed when did we pass by them, but the transition between tall and town-like buildings to small and mere houses is evident.

I think we're far enough... and closer to the one place I want to be.

Kakaisip ko nga niyan, gusto ko ng magpalamon sa inuupuan ko. Tumawa pa nga yung kasama kong tumigil na kaka-rant sa tenga ko.

"Gus... gusto mo bang pagusapan?"

And there it is... "Took you long enough to ask that."

"Eh, ikaw itong nagmumukang tuyong uga at parang ayaw mo pa ngang magsalita..." hindi ako sumagot at inaangatan lng siya ng baga. "...Pero pwede ba."

"Whatever... depende kung sasagutin ko yung sasabihin mo."

I heard him sigh, lowering the music that I didn't even noticed was playing on his radio, hanggang sa tunog nalang ng sasakyan ang maririnig mo.

"Hindi naman sa tatnungin kita... pero comment lang ako sana na hindi ko talaga inexpect na papatol ka sa magulang mo— I mean, sa tagal tagal nating pagkakaibigan, ngayon ko lang na-witness ang ganitong ganap sa buhay mo... yung lumayas ka."