Responsibilities That Ties Us

Chapter 33: Sometimes You Have to Let's Go

"Sige, iwan ko muna kayo ha... maglilinis pa kasi ako ng lamesa," sabi ng ina ni Nathan. She took one last glance, saying, "Feel at home kalang Kamilo ha? Dadalhan lang kita ng pagkain, teka lang," bago isara ang pinto, leaving me and Nathan in... an akward silent.

I mean, sino ba yung hindi maaakward dahil sa pinanggagawa ko kanina...

Nathan was moving around the room, yung room na tutulugan ko which is also his, while I sat on the bed facing the all as all the memories from before flooded my brain. Yung parang... nagising ako sa isang panaginip.

Except... this was real.

I'm here, physically— and he's just right behind me. At yung pinanggagawa ko sa kanya kaniya'y... totoo rin.

I badly want to slam myself into the wall, just to regain some self-respect from the bamboo wall.

The bed dipped a bit, and I was not given a time to react properly because naharap ko siya ng wala sa oras— so close na halos maamoy ko na yung sabong ginagamit niya... damn.

Iniwas ko ang aking mata, mas interesado sa kumot nanakapalupot saking paa, but I was forced to look back by him, his finger brushing under my chin ever so slightly. I swallowed, trying to hide that it took me off guard.

"What."

He stared, only for a few second, bago umatras at ngumiti ng hinhin. "Wala... ang tahimik mo kasi."\

I rolled my eyes swatting his hands away at tumalikod pabalik sa kanina kong pwesto.

The silence weaver longer this time, and I was starting to see my memories right infront of my eyes. But of course, it didn't take long bago ko maramdaman yung presensya nila sa likuran ko— sinandal pa nga yung noo niya sa balikat ko, like it was such a normal thing to do between us.

I would've pushed him off... it weren't for my chest warming at that slightest contact we had. Hindi ko mahanap sa sarili kong itulak siya palayo.

"Pasensya sa... bigla kong pag-ghost sayo."

Natigil yung pagtakbo ng maingay kong utak sa binulong niya saakin, and suddenly, lahat ng iniis naakala ko'y nilabas ko na ay bumalik. So I sat there, glaring at the wall habang niramdam yung mga kamay niyang umikot sa aking beywang, yumakap ng mahigpit na parang tatakbo ako bigla.

I reached down over his hands, at biglang humigpit mga kamay niya.

"Wag... wag muna..." He whispers. I sat there dumbfounded and unable to find the right words to retort. Usually, when I'm irritated marami akong pwedeng sabihing hindi maganda, but right now I... I don't have anything left to say.

Only unanswered questions.

"Why... did you suddenly stop texting me?"

He was quiet for a moment.