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Chapter 6

"Shiyu..." Jhanvi di called me after a while. "Ma is calling you."

I got up from my bed and walked to the living room. Ma was sitting, so I sat in front of her on a chair. Ma looked strict now. And all my sisters look really strict and worried too.

"Shiyu..." Ma called, "We are all so worried about you." She said.

"I am sorry," That is all I could say.

"We want to take you to see a doctor," Ma said. "To get some professional help. What is your opinion on that?"

"Psychiatrist?" I asked. I kind of did feel scared at the idea of that. But judging by what I did today, I can understand why my family made this decision. "Let me think about it," I said.

"There is nothing much to think. You are going, and that is all." Priyu di, said strictly.

"Don't force it up on her, Priyu." Janhvi di said. "Can't you see she is distressed?"

"Di, what are you saying? We have to drag her there if she refuses. Didn't you hear what she did? What if there is no one to save her the next time? I can't believe you would be so stupid Shiyu that you would want to die for just a guy? Over just a guy? Is your life worth only that much?" She looked extremely angry.

I felt ashamed. And more lost and alienated and hurt.

"Look, Shiyu... Ma would like if you would see a psychiatrist." Ma said., "You do realise that the way you have been behaving for the past month is not normal. I understand your pain. But you lost your job over it. And you are not even coming out of your room. That is not normal. And what you did today..... We are concerned. So please listen to Ma. I will myself find a good doctor for you."

"There is this psychiatrist that my friend goes to. Dr Jyothi." Priyu di said. "She is really good. I can try getting an appointment this week." She told me.

I felt conflicted. I felt like I was a patient. That there is something wrong with me. I know what everyone said made sense. However, I did not want to accept the fact that I was up to a point where I would need psychiatric help. I felt like a mental patient. I did not like that.

"We all are with you in this," Jhanvi di said and placed a hand on my hand. "Don't think you are alone. We all understand your pain, Shiyu. We just want to help you. It hurts us to see you in this much pain. If you get some professional help, it will reassure all of us."

"Fine," I finally said. "I will come."

They all smiled.

Then the calling bell rang.

Milky went to open the door. She opened the door, and Akshay was standing in front of the door. We all looked at him.

"Hey," He waved a hand. His other hand was held behind him. "Can I talk to Shiyu...Shiyu?" He looked unsure about my name. I guess he caught my name when my family members called me but was not sure he heard right.

I got up and went to the door, as Milky left us there. I had a bone to pick with Akshay anyway. If he did not tell my family about the suicide attempt, things would not have got this bad. So I grabbed his t-shirt sleeve and dragged him outside the door to the corridor.

I was glaring at him, so he could see the anger in my eyes.

"What is wrong?" He asked.

"I asked you not to tell them. I begged you to not tell them." I told him.

He took a serious expression, "Listen, both you and I know that telling them was the responsible thing to do. I know it hurt them beyond anything. But they have the right to know. And I hope they can take better care of you now, and take you to get some professional help or something. Because I had suggested to your mother that you need therapy or medicines or something." He said.

I frowned.

"Come on, chill... Look, I have brought you something." He brought his other hand out to the front, and he was holding a tub of choco-chip ice cream. "Have this, and enjoy every last bit of it." He thrust the tub into my hand. Because I looked puzzled he added, "Since I promised already."

I looked up at him. Like I said, he did look cute. But I could not determine his age, by just looking at him. He felt a bit younger than me. Not that it matters. And I can't just suddenly ask someone how old they are.

"And if you ever need a friend," he said. "I am here. Apartment 1009. Just two floors up."

What was nice about this was that it was not a sleazy attempt to hit on me. He genuinely sounded like he wanted to be 'just friends', to help out a depressed girl. Like he was genuinely being nice. No ulterior motive. He seemed really sweet.

"Thanks," I mumbled in a small voice.