Before The Dreamer - The Rookie

Four - Tim*

As I stood in front of my closet, carefully selecting my outfit for the day, my mind was consumed by thoughts about Jana's tumultuous experiences over the past few years. I was struck by my empathy for her, realizing I could relate to many of her challenges.

This realization sent shivers down my spine. It's truly alarming to contemplate the hardships children like Jana are forced to confront, seemingly without anyone to offer them support or protection. I simply couldn't ignore Jana's difficult circumstances.

The trauma of such an experience is something that no one, especially a child, should ever have to endure. It can leave deep emotional scars that may last a lifetime, and many individuals struggle to cope with the impact.

It is tough to comprehend the extent of the suffering that can result from such experiences. A robust and reliable support system is crucial for navigating life's challenges and finding healing and restoration.

Yes, I didn't find that until I met my best friend, Angela, though I have found it. Don't tell her I said that, though. Then came Lucy; it was bizarre to feel supported by someone finally because if you don't have that, you have this feeling in your brain that you are not good enough even though you are trying your best.

As I reflected on my thoughts for some time, I noticed Jana's subtle jump when I opened the door, indicating her increased stress in this unfamiliar environment. It's completely understandable; I can't imagine anyone not feeling the same way.

"Okay, what movie do we want to watch?"

"I don't think I have ever seen a whole movie; you should pick. It's your house."

"How about Frozen? How does that sound?"

"Sure. I haven't ever heard of it."

"Wait, you have never heard of Frozen."

"I'm sorry. I didn't mean to upset you."

In that instant, a deep, piercing pain gripped my heart, consuming me entirely. The young girl by my side had weathered more trials and tribulations than anyone should ever face.

She carried the weight of undeserved apologies, which pained me to see her burdened in this way. It seemed unjust that she felt compelled to apologize for anything, but her past traumas had shaped her psyche to respond this way.

"You didn't upset me, Jana; I thought you had watched it before."

"Oh. I'm sorry."

"It's okay, Jana, I promise. How about we watch it, and then you can tell me what you think? If you like it, we can watch the second one, too. Does that sound like a plan?"

"Yeah, I like that plan."

"Okay, let's do it."

As I reached for the remote and pressed the play button, a wave of profound sadness washed over me. The thought of parents mistreating their children is alarming and disheartening. Being a part of that household, I wouldn't want anyone to go through the same experience, incredibly not sweet little Jana, who remains blissfully unaware of the unsettling dynamics around her.