By the North Star | An Odesta Fanfic

Chapter Fourteen

Finnick never returned to the party. He stood outside as Annie shut the door behind her, and listened to her footsteps walking away, until he was sure that she wasn't coming back. Then he left, going back to his own house alone with her words still ringing in his head.

He couldn't sleep that night, haunted by nightmares. Not by any nightmares of his past, but of that panic in Annie's eyes as she begged him to tell her what was going on. It was almost worse than any old memories. When Finnick woke up, her fear was just as real as it had been when he was asleep, and he had been the one to cause it.

Living with guilt was nothing new to Finnick. He was quite used to it by now, after so many years of Hunger Games and dead tributes and selling his body in return for Capitol secrets. But when it came to Annie Cresta, the guilt was tearing him apart. He had spent his whole life lying: to the Capitol, to his parents, and even to himself. But he had never been any good at lying to Annie Cresta. Maybe it was love, maybe it was all those promises he had made to her, or maybe it was just the old bond of a mentor to his tribute, but Finnick could never shake the feeling that he was meant to look out for Annie.

So, as soon as he could gather up enough courage to face what he had done, he made his way back to her house. It was Mags who answered the door, and she was already shaking her head before Finnick could finish his question.

"Is Annie here?"

"She left," said Mags. "I'm sorry, Finnick, she was gone early this morning. I don't know where she went."

He hadn't really expected to find her there. Even if she was, would she even have agreed to see him? He had been playing a part for so long. How could she be sure that he really wanted to tell the truth this time?

"Sorry to bother you," he murmured, turning around to leave.

"Finnick –"

He stopped, and Mags sighed.

"Just tell her the truth," she said. "You're not helping anyone by keeping this all on yourself,"

"I know," he told her. "I know, Mags, I just... I wish that I had never dragged her into all of this."

Mags just frowned, her eyes downcast, and Finnick turned to leave again. But her voice stopped him.

"She thought she saw Snow."

Finnick looked up. "What?"

"After you left. There was no one there, of course, but she thought she saw him."

Were her hallucinations still so vivid? Finnick felt another wave of guilt wash over him. Maybe he ought to have paid more attention to her when he was home.

"If it had been me finding Snow in front of my house," Mags went on. "I would have been terrified."

"I think anyone would be," Finnick said quietly. He knew the feeling. Even hours after catching Snow's eye at some party, he could still feel the lingering panic in his crawling skin and racing heartbeat.

"But Annie wasn't."

"What do you mean?"

"When she saw him, she jumped right up and started telling him off, trying to get you back from the Capitol. And she didn't stop. Bay had to pull her away from him – or from whatever she saw."

Finnick had no trouble believing that. It certainly sounded like Annie. He had seen her standing up to the Careers, to drunkards in bars, and even to him, when he deserved it. Why would she hesitate to stand up to Snow?

"You can try to protect her all you want, but it's not going to stop her from fighting for you." Mags looked up at him and smiled, a little sadly. "Just tell her what's going on. I think she can handle it."