THE VAULT

Love is Blind [FOOL'S GOLD]

This is just a continuation from the previous chapter basically where they meet Joe's family

Taylor Swift's Point of View
It's been one week and I've already had five emotional breakdowns over how awful this morning sickness is. I basically live next to a trash can. Anytime I leave the house I bring emesis bags, medication, snacks, and water. That doctor was right when he said I'd feel like shit because this is absolutely debilitating. I genuinely don't know how I'm going to deal with this because every minute I feel like I'm going to vomit. I cry in the middle of the night because of it and I can't even get a drink to make myself feel better. Joe and I are in the OB/GYNs doctors office and I'm sitting on the table with a gown on. They've already taken my vitals and I've filled out my medical information. We're just waiting on the doctor. After this we are going to London and I'll be meeting Joe's family.
I'd be lying if I said I wasn't terrified. I went on a five day bender while I was pregnant. I did research and apparently a whole bunch of things can happen to the baby. There's a chance my baby could be born with thing called neonatal abstinence syndrome. Basically they withdrawal from the drug I took. My baby might literally have to detox from oxycodone because of me. My baby could have a low birthweight from the alcohol or be born premature. Maybe I need to stay off of Google.

The doctor comes walking in and introduces herself to Joe and I. Her name is Joanna Reed. I wanted to find the best doctor in the area and she had 4.7/5 stars so that worked for me. Don't judge me for using stars to decide. I don't really know what I'm doing here.

"Are you ready to get started?" Joanna asks me as my knee bounces up and down from the nerves.

"Yep. Yes, 100%, totally ready. I am...coolio. I am not nervous or panicking at all! I am in a perfectly normal human state of consciousness. I am ready." My heart is pounding and I'm not sure if I'm breathing. If I wasn't breathing I'd be dead so the odds are good that I'm breathing.

"You can relax. It's perfectly normal to be anxious during your first ultrasound. A lot of first time mothers go through it. You're going to be just fine." She tells me, trying to calm my nerves.

"What if-" I start but get cut off.

"Breathe in...breathe out." She instructs be to take long inhales and exhales to calm myself down which I do for a couple minutes.

"Okay, I'm ready." I put my legs in the stirrups and lay back. She inserts the transducer into very special places I would never like to speak of again and I mean never. The ultrasound starts and Joe and I both look over at the black and white screen. He holds my hand as we wait for the imagine to appear.

"Here's your cervix, your uterus, the placenta..." The doctor points to different places on the screen and honestly I can barely read anything at all. "This is the embryonic sac and this little thing right here. This is your baby. She shows a small peanut like dot on the screen, confirming it. I'm pregnant.

"That's-that's our baby?" I ask with my voice cracking. They're so small. They're nothing and everything at the same time.

"Indeed it is. They're roughly 11 weeks old and here's their heartbeat." I cover my mouth with one of my hands as tears begin to roll down my face. Loud whooshes are playing again and again. The most perfect sound in the world.

"Are-are they healthy? Are they okay?" Tears are still running down my face probably from the overwhelming hormones.

"For 11 weeks, they are looking good. From a current stand point, your baby is perfectly healthy. It's just too early to detect most abnormalities."

"I'm-I'm an oxy addict. I'm getting sober and I need to make sure my baby is healthy. I-I went on a bender when I didn't know I was pregnant. I need to make sure my baby is okay." I explain going into another panic mode.