Sugar : Fred Weasley

69: Sweet

[victoria's pov]

May 5th, 1999

It's been over a year since the Battle of Hogwarts and since then, I've been tortured with my ability to manipulate time. For months, I tried to extend myself from learning how to turn back time. It wasn't possible... the mockery of magical abilities poked at me in my sleep.

Even my mind had turned against itself as I began to dream of the future Fred and I could have had. In my dreams, I'd see him and be held by his warm embrace until it turned cold and surreal. Until I realised it was exactly that. Unreal.

An image to puppeteer my feelings like a rag doll to amuse the cruel gods below. You can only imagine what that does to a person. Especially with unhinged hormones.

It was especially disheartening to me when I learned Fred would never know of his lineage. It was more heartbreaking to know that with the fact I never got to say goodbye, he'd never be able to greet his children.

Yes, I promised to follow him no matter what, but I couldn't do this to my daughters. The battle I had against myself grew violent until I found out about my daughters.

Talking to the moon did not help. Unanswered prayers were false hope and hope was peeling at my skin, leaving me with raw, crimson skin.

But once my perfect daughters were born, I found my strength. In their eyes, I saw the same twinkle as Fred's and the same resembling hair. Their vitality of light reminded me of Fred.

Much reminded me of Fred.

Though Fred and George had always been distinctive to me, I now found it hard to trust my own eyes. I once walked into the bathroom, seeing George's bloody fists with the sink littered with broken glass. I would never know how much it hurt George to lose his twin.

How much it'd hurt to see his face in the mirror everyday and not see Fred. But I understood him on a limited level, that for as long as George lived, Fred would haunt me.

But maybe, a better word for it was follow rather than haunt. The ring laced with Fred's blood on my ring kept it to be true.

The Burrow was filled with the Weasley family, as we'd gotten together for the small anniversary of the Battle of Hogwarts for who we lost. Fred, Remus, Tonks... they'd left their son, Ted. It would mainly consist of a small dinner with everyone–Percy and George had moved back to the Burrow shortly after the war. But Bill, Fleur, Charlie, and my brother had left since the order was no longer around. With Ginny gone at Hogwarts, it was hard to not feel alone throughout the year.

With McGonagall as headmaster, there was a holiday for the same week of last year's battle. It tore at my heartstrings to realise that I was not the only one who lost loved ones. I was not the only one suffering and yet I'd never felt lonelier, even with my daughters. I once depended on Fred, who was my whole.

And now there was a little void.

There was a knock at my door. I had taken Ginny's old room since she wasn't around so now belonged to me and my girls. I stood up, opening the door. As soon as I did, light filled the dim room. I could hear chatter from downstairs and came face to face with Ginny who was holding a box.

"Hey, you," she said with a smile. "Are you coming down soon? Dinner will start soon."

I smiled. "Yes, just... putting the girls to sleep."

"Oh, well do you need help?" she asked.

I shook my head. "What's in the box?"

She hesitated to answer, as if wanting to now take it out of sight. But she bit her lip and answered, "It's for you. It's just some of his belongings... They're for you."