No Teachings in These Readings

Music

Music has always been my fatal crutch I'll probably die listening to a song. Hopefully your playing bangers at my funeral I'll be checking somehow.

In songs I've felt the rage of years and it's more than blissful. I guess music started at a young age with my Dad Chris showing me what music has always meant to him. If their was ever a day too heavy or too cloudy or too much obnoxious overthinking a song a voice or an instrumental vibe is a way free of rusted shackles.

Through a breakup I would cut deep and find no purpose within myself music was always the cure to that disease of a mind. I did learn a little bit on guitar and blasted anything just to even strum delicately with an always off tune tang. A band or at least an idea is something I can't shake. I think in that world you couldn't stop my happiness. Music is my religion. A guitar I have not... But that doesn't stop me from to bringing life to this idea. We all have ideas to find happiness or an idea and it may never manifest and it may always remain a passing thought.

Most nights I wonder what happened and I sit there blaming myself for everything for nothing. I cry shake and hyperventilate to the toxic message of an unpieced mind.

You betray me my friend everyday dear mind you leave my heart and soul to fight too many battles. Music shuts it off..... Working out or working shuts it off.... I consume myself with lack of sleep punish myself not to eat and in that late night silence your words echo off the Street lamp. I consume myself to overwork and to see myself hated by the chaos of everyone. Each day I fight man.... The tears I will pocket he anxiety I won't be able to shake but it just might be okay darling. The constant sinking of not wanting to live becomes unbearable in retched company.

In song lyrics I become alive and it may change all day or it may change how to view myself or my life from here on out.

I am, I am I said I'm not myself but I'm not dead and I'm not for sale hold me closer closer let me go let me be just let me be-Scott Weiland

And as we wind on down the road our shadows taller than our soul there walks a lady we all know who shines white light and wants to show how everything still turns to gold and if you listen very hard the tune will come to you at least to be a rock and not to roll-Robert Plant
Got so much salt from your lies poured into me
You didn't see yourself dead already
So full of it with every breath that you breathe
But you forget that in your fairy tale, I'm the wolf
All this attention got you thinking that you're a queen
You think that everything you're doing isn't a dream
Long as it feels alright
I had gotten frozen by the way you walked
By the love that you gave, by that look on your face
It's a cover up
I know everything
I had gotten frozen by the way you walked
By the love that you gave, by that look on your face
It's a cover up
I know everything
I know everything
You're made for four-letter fame
Regret is part of your name
It's something you couldn't tell
It's what you wanted to feel
It's what you're dying to feel-Greg Puciato