all Chan's | Chan x Felix x Jeongin

5

Is he only ever sweet if he wants to fuck?

Felix was lying awake, staring at the man next to him in bed. Chan was far asleep but the younger couldn't close his eyes.
Chan just looked so pretty, breathing so peacefully, the moonlight caressing his skin.
Felix couldn't get enough of the view.
Yet he couldn't help but feel a tiny stinging pain in his chest while looking at him.

Chan didn't even want to hold him. After he had taken Felix apart he went right to sleep, no cuddles, no talking.
Felix understood the older was tired from work but he could've at least asked if everything was okay.

Felix turned around, not wanting to face him anymore. Chan had held him so sweetly earlier. He had said such nice things and his touch was so gentle. But it all faded away when the heat of the moment was over.

A tear rolled down Felix's cheek as he wished for Chan to be more caring. It seemed like he only ever was when it was beneficial for him.
Maybe it was too much to ask.
Felix whiped the tear away and buried his face in a pillow.

♡♡♡

Felix woke up to sunlight on his face.
It took him a second to adjust to the foreign room. He looked around to see Chan was already gone, probably off to work.
Felix sighed. He was still feeling depressed even after getting what he had desired so long.
His body felt sore but he turned to cling onto the blanket that still had Chan's scent on it.

After resting for another while, Felix got up and started getting ready to live stream all day again.
He took a shower to clear out his thoughts and to wash Chan's touch away. Even when he wanted all of this to happen, he still felt regretful in his heart.

Felix enjoyed getting some escape from real life through his games and the small audience. Even when it took him some energy to get started, he always felt better while streaming.

He only noticed how fast the time went by, when he heard the apartment door unlock.
Chan was home. Felix's stomach turned and he decided to end the live, somehow getting a bad feeling.
It had started to get dark outside and Felix's stomach was growling as he remembered he had forgotten to eat lunch.
He knew he'd meet Chan if he went to the kitchen right away but he still decided to do so.

"Hey Lix" Chan greeted him while preparing something on the counter.
"I brought food, just heating it up"
Felix looked at him for a second.

This is really the guy that fucked me?
Chan looked so good in that stupid white tanktop with a zip up hoody thrown over to reveal his collar and a bit of his shoulder.

Somehow Felix wanted it all back. Getting to lay in his bed and being fucked senseless by such a gorgeous man. Being allowed to touch him and make him feel good.
Felix slightly bit his lip without noticing. Chan looked irresistible with his dark wayv hair, cut just over his eyes.

"Are you just gonna stare or will you come and eat with me?" Chan teased him from the other side of the room.
Felix was pulled back to reality. He sat down with Chan to eat but couldn't keep his eyes off of him.

It was sweet of him to bring food and Felix almost felt so safe with Chan but as their eyes met the younger was reminded of last night. Of how cold Chan was towards him after he was done fucking him. And of how alone Felix felt lying in bed even when Chan was right next to him.
Of how he finally got to feel Chan's touch but when it was all over Felix was left feeling empty and used.

He couldn't stop his eyes from watering up as he tried his best to get the food down.
He tried to hide his face but Chan still noticed.
"Shit, are you okay?" he asked.
Felix couldn't get out a single word.

"Lix, what's going on?" he sounded genuinely concerned.
Chan gently brushed Felix's hair to the side to reveal tears rolling down his face. He took a deep breath then cupped the younger's cheek in his hand.
"Felix baby you need to talk to me"
He didn't want to talk last night, why would he want to talk now?

"It's because I was so cold to you right?" There was hesitation in Chan's voice.
"Fuck Chan, I want this so bad" Felix finally managed to say something.
"I want your touch and I want to make you feel good" his words came out in pieces between shaky breaths.
"I loved it when you fucked me but I don't think my heart can take this" he hastly tried to whipe the tears that wouldn't stop.

"Lix I understand. I know I wasn't exactly sweet to you" Chan got up from his chair to get next to Felix and wrap his arms around him.
"To be honest, I was hesitant at first because I wasn't sure if I wanted this"
His hold felt so comforting.
"But god, you felt so good"

Felix pressed his face into Chan's chest. He didn't care anymore, he just wanted to be held.
"I'll take the day off tomorrow and we'll do something nice together, okay?"
Chan leaned down and placed a kiss on Felix's forehead.
"We can take this slowly" he whispered.
The younger's heart was racing. He wanted to give Chan another chance. He wanted to continue doing anything the older asked.

"Okay" Felix managed to catch his breath. He felt a little better.