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i stand in front of the mirror / feeling both dread and determination / i see a face that should be familiar / but it feels like a stranger / my gaze flits from one flaw to the next / each one magnified by the harsh lighting / i try to say “i love you” out loud /but the words stick in my throat /
i wonder why it’s so hard to say those words to myself / when it seems so easy to say to others /
i wonder why my brain refuses to accept the idea of self-love / when it seems to come so naturally to those around me /
i wonder how i’ve ended up here / spending so much time criticizing every little thing /
but / there’s a tiny voice in my head that whispers / “tomorrow‚ you should try again.”
it’s a promise to myself to try to be kinder / to see myself through a more forgiving lens / but why not today? you might ask /
the truth is / today i am not ready to love myself just yet /
today / i am still caught up in seeing all my faults / all my flaws /
today / i cannot find the words to say /
so / i will try again tomorrow / when the sun rises / when my mind is clear & my heart is open /
for today / i am too afraid to look in the mirror / to confront the truths that stare back at me /
