Love, life, and everything in between.

It's seasonal...right?

I get poetic when I'm sad and the months get colder.
I find myself looking around for things to stay alive for.
The sun, when it shines through any type of window.
Silence.
A new candle.
Fresh sheets.
My family.
My siblings.
I have this prolonged sadness that can't ever seem to leave me.
I'm finding more things to live for.
Watching the seasons change.
A good paycheck.
Maybe an education.
Occasionally my job.
Baking, is a hobby, I think?
Still trying to find more things...?
Music.
Poetry.
New movies.
Books.
I'm making this up as I go along now.
Laundry day.
Cleaning after being depressed for a really long time.
The holidays.
My dogs.
I think I'm feeling better?
A new cooking recipe.
My grandparents.
My baby sister.
My little brother.
School starting?
I'm sinking again.
Maybe I should change how I look;
to distract how I'm feeling on the inside.
A new tattoo.
A new piercing.
A new haircut.
A new wardrobe.
A new hair color.
New clothes?
I think I'm feeling better...
I have to shed my old self to make room for my new self.
And then the cycle repeats.
Again
Again
And again.
Touch some grass.
Smoke some grass.
Reconnect with nature.
Reconnect with friends.
Vent.
Journal.
Go to the record store.
Wash my car.
Put gas.
Donate old clothes.
I've tried.
I'm tired.
Again.