Fragmented Morality

Ch. 11

It was such a shame that the world had fallen to pieces for many reasons. However, on this day, it was for the fact that medicine would eventually dwindle to nothing and the survivors would be forced to use less... modern treatment options.

What had these thoughts passing briefly through Christopher's mind was how long he had been able to sleep the night before without waking up to the nightmares that plagued his reality. It had been a tiny pill in comparison to the weight of his troubles, but it managed to send him into a slumber that he did not stir from until the effects inevitably wore off. Even then, however, the young man was left feeling like he hadn't slept a wink.

The time had passed him by so quickly that, while his body was well rested, his mind held onto the concerns from the previous night. As it seemed, even modern medicine didn't have a cure-all for the stresses of the new world.

Though, it appeared, some things still applied from before; most people had heard of Schrodinger's cat; though the paradoxal experiment never really sat actively in anyone's mind, on this day, it was the perfect way to explain how Christopher felt.

He had promised his mother that he would stop fighting her and accept the reality that Sophia was probably never going to come back, not because he wanted to appease her, but rather, because he was finding it increasingly more difficult to maintain hope. Even so, with the appearance of a semi-nearby farmhouse, he couldn't quell the need to inspect it. If, in the likely event she wasn't there, however, that was it. He promised to focus on keeping himself and his mother alive.

...A part of him didn't want to look...

If she wasn't there, Christopher would have to accept that he would never get to see his little sister again. She would be gone forever and he had barely done anything to save her. But, if she was there, he would have been able to bring her home and look his mother in the eyes knowing he did the right thing.

However, that was part of the problem. He would have to go to find out.

●

"This is where the farmhouse is," Daryl said, pointing a finger to a densely wooded area located on the west side of the map. He looked up to make sure I was following along and glanced between my mother and I before sliding his rough finger across the parchment. "It's not far from this housin' development. If she's not here, we'll be checkin' here next."

As soon as the effects of whatever Mr Greene had given me wore off completely, I found myself unable to fall back asleep despite how hazy it had left my mind. It wasn't a pleasant feeling to come out of an artificial sleep, but I did find it somewhat calming to have rid myself of the nightmares for even one night.

I would have liked to be able to say that it gave me a clear head for when I went to speak with Daryl, but I would have been lying. I don't think there was ever a time I could remember when my head was clear, it was just one thing after another; it was Ed, the end, the beginning after, Ed's death, Sophia... it was always one thing after the other.

Well, maybe there was a time, briefly, so fleeting it never came to mind. A time in between this and that, when everything was not good or bad but simply 'okay'. A time when I was so incredibly young it was hard to remember.

In the end, did that even count? What was the good if it was completely overtaken by the terrible?

I did, obviously, speak to the man despite my heart picking up the pace as if it were saying 'run away' whenever I was near him. However, he was the only one who was truly still looking. Everyone else had given up before they even started, and anyone who tried to deny it just wanted to look like a good person. If it weren't for him, this opportunity wouldn't have even existed in the first place.